Imprisonment and Inhuman Treatment

Discussion in 'Diamond Lil's' started by Nutty, Apr 23, 2008.

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  1. On Friday 19.4.08 I was subject to six and half hours illegal detention in Blue Water Shopping Centre by my Wife and two Daughters alleging that in my capacity of "Father of the Bride" it was legal to detain me and subject myself to the following inhuman treatment:

    1. I was forced to drive them to the said "Blue Water Male Abuse Centre
    2. I had to enter female clothe and accessory shops
    3. I had to examine and pass opinion on the same.
    4. I was Forced to enter Female shoe shops and examine the shoes
    5. I was asked to pass comment then abused for being negative
    6. I was verbally and physically abused for ogling females of about 18 years old in short tight clothing.
    7. I was forced to eat a healthy slimmers lunch
    8. I was forced to carry excessive gay-ly coloured shopping bags above my safe load weight
    9. I was forced above and beyond the call of duty to use cash and credit cards to purchase items of which I dis-approved of.
    10 And last but not least I was threatened that I may have to wear Top Hat and Tails. (I did offer to appear in a very tight set of No1's or beige linen jacket, white shirt, cream trousers, brown brogues, silk tie of their choice and a Panama hat if it was hot) This was rejected with mirth and derision.

    How many of you out there have been subjected to false detention and humiliating treatment. Link attached to this hell hole men beware


    Blue Water


    Nutty
     
  2. Poor Nutty. Perhaps you should have dressed me up as your self (I sure only Chrissie would have been able to tell the difference) and I'd have willingly accompanied your alleged torturers.... they'd have looked at ladies shoes, I'd keep a lookout for mature sailor types in tight fitting No.1s :razz: :drool:
     
  3. Next time offer to buy the child a ladder as a wedding present. Then show soon to be groom how to use it and encourage elopement.
     
  4. I was told I must wear my new best Berghaus Goretex jacket when going on the latest walkabout with the Irish Ramblers on the West Coast. The scruffy smelly green one has to stay at home.

    There are a few marks on the new Berghaus it will have to go in the wash!!! Of course if it is pissing down everybody will see the marks on the jacket I am sure!!!!!!
     
  5. Nutty : You poor lamb....I presume this torture was only inflicted due to pending wedding ?....think about it- you'll only ( hopefully) have to go through this twice.

    Next time, cry off with a bout of meningitis ....I hope you were well fortified with coffee and muffins along the route, especially carrying all those bags.....

    Personally, in the normal course of duties, I consider taking blokes shopping akin to animal cruelty....looking at members of the 'Cornered Club' outside any ladies changing rooms- blokes with arms folded, dropping heads and despairing faces...how very tragic.
     
  6. ooo I never take the POS shopping, it ruins the whole experience. He is best left at home.
     
  7. P-O

    Bit late with the info but thanks. I have now returned to my lair in Spain and now do not have to parade again until the wedding in July.

    Have you got to BRNC yet or are you still waiting to grow some more. PM me with your progress
    Nutty
     
  8. Nutty, make sure you visit the law offices of Frick, Frack, Null and Void to have them draw up the Bill of Goods for the dear daughter.

    You should ensure that her intended knows what the limited warranty is, where to take her if she's not working properly, how often he needs to service her, and that your sale final, no refund policy.

    Trust me, you want to make sure he can't give her back. (nine years the kidlet has been living away and NOW she decides that she needs "mum" time with me...they keep coming back)
     
  9. I legged it 11 years ago onto a narrow boat which I moved every time they found me. Having run out of canals I moved to Spain.
     
  10. Didn't you know that these shopping centres now have male "Creche's"?

    Women can check their husbands/partners in for a predetermined period of time and then collect them after they have shopped.

    I believe that these Creches are commonly known as "pubs".
     
  11. Good to see you getting in touch with your female side, Nutty. How, exactly did they force you? Threats of violence, withdrawal of privileges or uncomely comparisons with other New Age Males. Frankly, I'm more than a little disappointed!
     

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