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I will be split from my partner and 2 year old for 5-8 months

JML82

Midshipman
First of all I want to apologise, I have so much respect for the Navy (Being from Portsmouth probably helps)

But I will be way from my Partner and 2 Year Old next year and it will hurt but its for work and a one off financial reward will just about make it worth it. As naval personnel are away for a large time, I thought this may be a good place to ask.

I am struggling as I don't want my son to forget me and I won't be able to skype as communications will be bad.
(I should be able to get a 1 off phone call per week though)

I thought about creting some videos that my partner can show to my son of counting numbers and letters etc.

Any other ideas would be appreciated.
 

Polto

War Hero
I know where Leighton Buzzard is...it's where half of Berkhamsted moved to in the in eighties if anecdotal info is to be believed.
I think I see where your coming from now, you need advice about being away and popping into a naval-related forum might provide that advice or at least some top tips etc.

Hopefully, someone more helpful than me will be along soon - apologies for misunderstanding you earlier.
 
Record stories for your son - I've done this personally, and it works. Grab 5 or 6 of his favourite stories, use your phone and record them, burn to CD. It'll keep him reminded of you (and your partner will likely listen to). If you can, take a kindle with some extra books, and then re-record about 3 months in and send the CD back home.

Have a map of where you are, and what is happening around you so that they both know what is happening. Try and send photos/postcards etc back home as well - no matter if they seem mundane to you.

Accept that stuff will change at home; your partner will get on with life, and you need to work out a way of fitting back in.

Google 'deployment cycle' (probably in conjunction with Naval Families Federation) and read through it with your other half. Understand what each phase will be like.

Make sure she's got a support network: not for nothing do most of us live near our other-halves families and friends...

It'll be shit, it'll be fine, it'll be great. embrace and understand that all 3 emotions can happen in the same day!
 

JML82

Midshipman
Record stories for your son - I've done this personally, and it works. Grab 5 or 6 of his favourite stories, use your phone and record them, burn to CD. It'll keep him reminded of you (and your partner will likely listen to). If you can, take a kindle with some extra books, and then re-record about 3 months in and send the CD back home.

Have a map of where you are, and what is happening around you so that they both know what is happening. Try and send photos/postcards etc back home as well - no matter if they seem mundane to you.

Accept that stuff will change at home; your partner will get on with life, and you need to work out a way of fitting back in.

Google 'deployment cycle' (probably in conjunction with Naval Families Federation) and read through it with your other half. Understand what each phase will be like.

Make sure she's got a support network: not for nothing do most of us live near our other-halves families and friends...

It'll be shit, it'll be fine, it'll be great. embrace and understand that all 3 emotions can happen in the same day!

Thank You..
 

JML82

Midshipman
This may sound like as tupid question, but I won't go away for another 3-4 months but its like a countdown has begun and I get really upset seeing him sleep for example, does anyone have any ideas on this?
 

dapperdunn

War Hero
Book Reviewer
This may sound like as tupid question, but I won't go away for another 3-4 months but its like a countdown has begun and I get really upset seeing him sleep for example, does anyone have any ideas on this?
Don't look at him while he's asleep.
You're welcome
 
This may sound like as tupid question, but I won't go away for another 3-4 months but its like a countdown has begun and I get really upset seeing him sleep for example, does anyone have any ideas on this?

Seriously, get into the deployment cycle.

but yes, try not watching him sleep!
 

WreckerL

War Hero
Super Moderator
It doesn't get any easier but you do learn to cope with it and find ways to accept it. Both my boys, when they were growing up, just accepted I was going away but I would be back and bearing presents :)

And acting like a big kid playing games with them all the time I could when I was home helped, unfortunately they've grown up now but I haven't ;)
 

Sumo

War Hero
When you get close to leaving you and your other half may fight or argue, it is just a process of hardening her self up to survive on her own, they always say those left behind have it tougher?
 

(granny)

RIP
Book Reviewer
Always remember that nothing is new. I had been married for 2 weeks when I went off to the FES for 18 months. It wasn't great but together we were strong and secure. I left knowing that nothing, that really mattered, would change for us. My wife worked, while I played, and the time went quickly. When I got home we had saved enough for the deposit on a house. My family came later, even with me still away at sea. It's the life we had, so we lived it.
All we had were letters.... way before all this new-fangled 'stuff' you have today. The getting back home and together was good!
 

WreckerL

War Hero
Super Moderator
One thing I will add, when you get back from a deployment, your partner will have a well established routine. You will have to adapt to their way, not the other way round, you are, in effect, an interloper in their lives.
 
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