Holidays in H.M.D.Q.P.

I cannot have been the only one on this site to ever have visited this most exclusive and effective of all fitness and exercise facilities.
Guaranteed to make you loose weight, and in the main stop smoking if only temporary.
Or maybe you were on the "Dark Side" a member of the staff.
So lets hear your dits/horror stories. 8O 8O 8O :cry: :cry: :cry:
Escort for oppo going to DQ"s, when entering , helping him with kitbag and hammock, set upon by "Tiny" and told in no uncertain terms that if I wanted to join him I was going the right way about it, so drop it !!
As a Young OD , did he scare me.
When my oppo came out after 56 days , he was a fitter, wiser man, from lower deck lawyer to anchor face .
He ended up doing 22years, and became a Chief, so maybe it did him good.
Was awarded ( sic) 28 but only served 18, close custody on board and then Rooke for 6 days, 4 days remission.
Even remember my cell No 69, they weigh you when you go in and when you leave, at 22 I was the oldest in there so when cook wanted help in the kitchen 9 times out of 10 I dipped in, plus the bloke I came in with did not eat duff so I always had 2 helpings, yep you guessed it, I actually gained 2lbs which the Joss put down to faulty scales...yeah right.
I was in just after they stopped doing the pudding bowl haircuts and most of the harsh regime, yes we still did the assault coarse every day at 06 dubs and loads of PT and drill but the worst part of deeks for me was the thought of going in.
All in all much like basic training ( as then ) but much more intense and they locked you up at night.
I got a spell in solitary whilst in DQ's as I answered a question without asking permission to speak. He bollocked me and asked me if I understood that you do not answer unless you ask permission to speak.

I replied "Yes Sir" and that was it, did me for direct disobedience, got 5 days solitary. All you get in there is bread and water, 8 pints of water and 6 slices of thick sliced bread. I was 12 stone when I went in recess and 10st 2lb when I came out. They cut your hair an hour before you get released just to be fcukin nasty. :cry: :cry: :cry:


War Hero
For all you poor sods who experienced DQs perhaps this is the answer.
Join together and start a class action against the RN because your human rights were violated. :lol:
Well it worked for up the Duff Wrns, Closet Poofs and even out in the open Gays. :oops:

think of the money you might make :p
Never had the misfortune to fall foul, though I did sail pretty close to the wind on several ocassions. My first ship crewed up in Victory barracks and we were joined there by 6 or so straight from RNDQ's. Scouse Giff a particularly hirsuit ex clearance diver was amongst them. All Nice chaps and thoroughly good characters.
Later served with a AEM? called "Honest Joe" when I was with 824D flight.
He was a tremendous character who was a frequent resident at this particular hotel and was even welcomed personally by the CO. he was the holder of several records at RNDQ and also ran for the FAA field gun team (When it was done properly) :lol:
I had the dubious pleasure of a 90 day stint but with remission did 60 days, Tiny was the man in charge at that time, a really hard barsteward but reasonably fair minded.
Looking at my physique now that 60 would do a load of good, but in all honesty would most probably finish me off, seeing that it was 51 years ago.
End result I had deserved it and finished my time reasonably well behaved.
had 3 stints in as a JACK2, from 79 onwards, it was a wonder i survived in the mob having had 3 trips over as a junior, not so fond memory's of the run in the morning or the scran, and the close confinment cell was a real pain. but the books in the cells were a real comfort, NOT< ships husbandry, rule of the road and the bible if my memory serves me right.

3 fags a day or boild sweets if you were a good boy, some of the staff were a bit over the top, the screaming skull was one and a booty used to ensure that the day always went without anything special happening, was in over christmas and new year, what a bundle of joy that was, santa never did manage to get my prezzies through that small window in the cell, almost certain he was staff in DQ's at some stage. must admit to being glad to get out of dq's and back to pembroke, but it was not long before i was back in again and again, did manage to keep my nose clean for the remainder of my time in the mob, (with a little good fortune on occassion, maybe reading the bible in the cell did some good!!!!!!1
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