Holdall/Bag/Suitcase Question for Leave

Discussion in 'Diamond Lil's' started by sgtpepperband, Oct 31, 2007.

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  1. sgtpepperband

    sgtpepperband War Hero Moderator Book Reviewer

    I've got some leave soon and I want to take some gizzits back to the UK; the thing is I only have a woden MFO storage crate, a 100-ltr Bergen and a carrier bag that I got from the PX when I bought a bottle of Morghan's Spicy Rum last night.

    What do you lot think? Pack the crate now so it'll arrive in the UK in about 6 months time, or take the Bergen and run the risk of never finding anything inside it ever again, or use the carrier bag and run the risk of looking like a Pikey in my flip flops, cut-off combat trousers, deployment t-shirt and $4 Raybans?

    Please give me your advice - I'm scared of making a decision by myself. I am a perfectionist, and my whole world will collapse if I have to make a contingency plan when faced with a short-notice dilemma again...

    8O :?
  2. wet_blobby

    wet_blobby War Hero Moderator

    SPB, I feel your pain. If I where you I'd use the carrier bag and the pikey look is all the rage now.
  3. SgtP
    Buy another bottle of Morgans rum, then you will have two carrier bags. Now you have matching luggage how cool is that
  4. Agreed. Use the bag and look like a pikey!!

    Contingency plan? Arrse the rum in the departurte lounge and kick off on the flight like a rockstar whos thrown his teddy in the corner. :thumright:
  5. sgtpepperband

    sgtpepperband War Hero Moderator Book Reviewer

    Hmm, thanks fellas - I really appreciate your help, but the thing is I'm really confused 'cos lots of people have told me lots of different things, and it's really doing my head. Especially when I know they're taking the piss out me!

    But I'll have the last laugh when I've read "Joining the Royal Navy Form Dummies" - that'll learn 'em... :thumbright:

    Off to buy some Miller Genuine Draft from the PX now (only 30c per can; same price as the Coke!) so I'll have another carrier bag (matching luggage, see?).

    Going back to my original query, shall I pack some thick pussers' black socks and a pair of steaming bats, 'cos I heard it's quite cool back home in the UK? I wanna show of my tan, but I reckon long socks and cut-offs might make me look silly... :?
  6. Alternativley you could ask Creddly, he seems all about on baggage at the moment....lol :thumright:
  7. wet_blobby

    wet_blobby War Hero Moderator

    Pussers sandals, leopard print thong and a fire party waistcoat would look quite fetching and show your tan off nicely.
  8. And leave that nasty crown in DG!!!
  9. sgtpepperband

    sgtpepperband War Hero Moderator Book Reviewer

    Huh, and you told me you wanted to see my rusty Sheriff's badge... :rambo:
  10. sgtpepperband

    sgtpepperband War Hero Moderator Book Reviewer

    Nah, I want a grip, not emotional baggage... :roll: :wink:
  11. Nicks,flip flops and snorkel in a pussers ditty box.Never travel with anything else.

    Dont forget you are only allowed 20kg luggage now and only 1 item of hand luggage.

    No fluids or razor sharp daggers or bombs.
  12. sgtpepperband

    sgtpepperband War Hero Moderator Book Reviewer

    Am I allowed to take my iPod on board the plane then? :?
  13. Yes provided you dont play it during take off and landing.
  14. Now that you have matching luggage sgtP don't forget to take out insurance, you know what the baggage handlers are like.
  15. sgtpepperband

    sgtpepperband War Hero Moderator Book Reviewer

    Oh no! Too much information... now I will probably fail at going on leave. I was really looking forward to it, as well... :cry:
  16. A report on your leave taking abilities will be forwarded to all those who have ever had anything to do with your career so far, I'm sure your AFCO(Is it stil open, is your Ninja Stoker still alive??) will be waiting with baited breath.
    Your inability to follow simple instructions from the knowledgeable membership of this august site does not bode well for your future, I therefore suggest that you peruse the Situations Vacant pages of The Sun :pukel:.
    Best wishes
    Concerned of NZ
  17. sgtP i thought the Iranians had nicked your ipod.
  19. Is a gizzit a rabbit?
  20. Forget the Bergen and carrier bags. I recommend you pack everything into a shabby brown suitcase and then stow away in a lifeboat on board a ship bound for the UK. When you get there, tie a label round your neck saying "Please look after this prat. Thank you."

    When questioned by immigration, state in broken English that you are from Peru and want to claim political asylum but make sure that you have destroyed any paperwork that indicates otherwise. If you get any aggro, keep saying the magic words "Human rights". Some poor sucker is bound to take pity on you and solve all your problems. It's certainly worked before.

    P.S. It helps if you like marmalade but I hear honey works too.


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