HMS Raleigh


War Hero
Super Moderator
If he's under 18 the staff should have contacted you, if over 18 you should still have contact details as Sumo has said. From experience the lads and lasses only ring home when they're down/skint/bored etc. When they're really having a good time the parents/guardians are the last to know.

They only moan to Mum or Dad because that's who they've always gone to in the past.


War Hero
Just support, ask him to speak with his peers, see how they are doing.
You should have contact details for his training staff, give them a call.
It won't be the first time a trainee drains down on the parents, then just gets on with it, leaving you in a mess.
@WreckerL used to work there maybe he can help not sure but others may be along
@pompeyexpat @crash_evans that are close to newbie training.
I've not worked in Phase 1, but my son went through in 2017 while I was at Raleigh in the Submarine School and I'm an admin on a Facebook page for families and what you're describing is far from unusual

As WreckerL says, it can seem as if things are worse than they actually are because recruits often use parents as a method of venting. They all feel down at times but rarely want to admit to their classmates how they feel so they call home. Having called home they often feel better for having vented (a problem shared and all that), but of course as far as you know they're at their lowest ebb and so of course you're worried.

The first 3 or 4 weeks are usually the worst too. They're very much suffering the 'shock of capture'; it's not what they thought it was going to be like, they're new to everything and so are getting lots of stuff wrong - which can attract a certain amount of negative attention (i.e. bollockings), and most are probably more tired than they've ever been. They get up at 0545 and between then and 2230 they are at it pretty much constantly.

By about week 4 or 5 they start to adapt, stop getting so many bollockings (usually), have started to bond as a team and no longer feel like they're stuck in an alien environment with a group of strangers. The training starts to become more 'fun' and more 'nautical' so more like the sort of thing they imagined they might be doing.

When your whole world is Phase 1 training though the end can seem out of sight if you're not enjoying it. (Most start to, but not all. Some never really enjoy their time at Raleigh). What they need to be reminded of is that it's not forever, in the grand scheme of things 10 weeks is nothing. And it's 10 weeks they'll never have to do again. Those that aren't enjoying it often decide that clearly because they don't like it the RN is therefore not for them. But of course Phase 1 isn't the RN, it's a means to an end, the time to instil the basic skills needed in the RN. If it was like that in the fleet nobody would stay - I certainly wouldn't till be doing it 28 years later.


thank you all you've made me put my mind at rest and good news is hes called today and spent a good 30 mins talking to everyone and sounds so much happier so must of just been a down day missing home tired stressed definitely helped talking to some people with experience


Hi @RDEMUM , as pompeyexpat said, he's an admin on a Facebook group called HMS Raleigh Family (Phase 1, Phase 2 and beyond), ask to join you'll find lots of help and understanding from other parents/partners, it's a wonderful group and no recruits are allowed on it. Hope this helps :)

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