Good put downs!

Discussion in 'Social & Reunions' started by Squirrel, Sep 7, 2007.

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  1. Hello guys,
    Sitrep is that I'm organising the pickle night for our small tri-service unit, and have managed to get everything I need.....except, as master of ceremonies, I know that I'm going to get heckled a little bit....I have a couple of good put downs to put hecklers back in their boxes, but does anyone have any more?? Any really good one's for Army or RAF mess members will be particularly welcome.

    cheers guys.

  2. chieftiff

    chieftiff War Hero Moderator

    The obvious RAF one: What are you still doing here, isn't the hundred year experiment over yet?
  3. shut it lumpy
  4. You RAF types have not been around long enough to have Tradition, you have HABITS and some of those are very odd

    Edited for piss poor spelling
  5. Had a good one while in JSSU(Cyprus) aimed at the Crabs. Something along the lines of "And let me remind you RAF the only things flying during the Battle of Trafalgar were sails and cannon balls!"
  6. chieftiff

    chieftiff War Hero Moderator

    If it's a Sergeant gobbing off there's always: Now you know why the cavalry won't call their three stripers sergeant. (Sergeant means servant so the cavalry equivelant is called a Corporal of Horse, no servants in the Cavalry!) it's an Army in joke.
  7. when someone gobs off say " when I want an ******** to speak I'll Fart!!"

    Took me 3 minutes to type that its all that cheap booze in the sarges mess where i have taken adbantage of the cheap booze got rayted up in feb only third time in therie.

    never moind in afganh soon plenty of toim e to sober up
  8. Ninja_Stoker

    Ninja_Stoker War Hero Moderator

    Yes, you're quite right.

    The shandy down South is indeed potent.
  9. If it's a Sergeant

    their is only three types of sarge! and if you call me it again

    I will masarge my sausarge up your back back pasarge!!
  10. Cheers guys, that's brilliant, keep 'em coming though!
  11. Dont knock me Im a professional.
    Just like your Mother!!!
    Usually good for starting a fight :threaten:
  12. We're throwing a return party tomorrow night. You bring your Missus, and I'll bring another couple of slappers!
  13. I heard Richard Branson's young son asked for a cowboy outfit for his birthday. So Richard brought him the (RAF, Guards, Paras, FAA) whatever fits.

  14. As the legal heirs and succesors to the RNAS guess where we got a lot of our habits, customs and slang from. :w00t:
  15. But you were suppose to return all that when the FAA was formed. Please place all Pussers property in a brown unmarked envelope and return forth with.

  16. Do you know whay the RAF doesn't like working Wednesdays, spoils both weekends.
  17. Can be used on any heckler....

    'Is that your own brain or are you breaking it in for an idiot??'

    Failing that, a 9mm through the nogging tends to put them down fast
  18. The Buddhists believe that when you die, depending on how you live your life,you will be reincarnated on a higher or lower will be reincarnated on a higher plain this time ,As a rubber plant.
  19. FAA? er Federal Aviation Authority? Apart from which the RAF has so much property it would fit in a brown unmarked cardboard box. :thumright:

    Maxi_77, you're so right!
  20. Many years ago in Germany a foolish USAF Captain asked me " say d'you speak English" Me, " Better than you do Sir".

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