Gary Speed

Watched him play for the Toon and he was a fine player,well respected.
Good looking guy,plenty of cash,lovely wife with two sons and a luxury house.
Can't begin to speculate on this one.
Can't be depression as he was laughing at an interview previous day.
It will come out I expect,in time.

 

I bumped into him quite a few times when he played for Bolton, as i live just around the corner from the stadium.

He was always willing to have a chat to anyone, which i always remember and always will. He did seem happy, but as we all know, what lies beneath, lies beneath. Time will tell.

RIP Gary Speed.

 

Sad as his death is as with any death, I can't understand the media frenzy around it.
It's a pity the media don't do the same when one of our servicemen or women lose their life in action.
Gary Speed had a choice, they sadly don't .
It seems the loss of one of our own doesn't generate the same impact as news when doing their job and serving their country.

Cynical of Staffordshire

 

You're not seriously saying that 'media-frenzy' over the death of someone famous comes as a surprise to you?

Remember Michael Jackson? Diana Princess of Wales? Jade bloody Goody?

 

I cannot imagine what would drive a person to take there own life when they appear to have all the trappings of success and apparently a good family.On the face of it a selfish act but until the inquest we shall have to hold our judgement.

 

If we cannot do him honour while he's here to hear the praise
then at least let's give him homage at the ending of his day's

Perhaps just a simple headline in the paper that might say


" OUR COUNTRY IS IN MOURNING: A SAILOR DIED TODAY" / soldier / airman

 

I disagree, every serviceman has a choice; you can refuse to soldier, consicenciously object, making choices that keep you from harm's way etc... If you do, people will judge you and you will suffer the consequences but you do have a choice. Integrity is whole diffrent issue; living with your decision would invariably be an issue for any 'true' serviceman.

There's no doubt Gary Speed, like many before him, had a choice. Whether he was in the right frame of mind to make the decision is up for perpetual debate; nobody will ever know. That's why I always get pissed off when people say it's a brave decision or equally call it selfish. You have to be thinking totally straight at the time to be considered either and by my reckoning most people will do it without a witness to verify that they were thinking clearly at the time.

Never mind beauty, choice is in the eye of the beholder...


edited to add: RIP Gary Speed

 

Luckily enough to have spent my final years at school in the same class as Gary.

RIP mate.

From one Evertonian and Deesider to another.

 

I was talking about the moment of death ie stepping on an IED etc.
As we have a volunteer armed forces at present people have a choice to serve or not to serve.
When you join up you know that one day you may be expected to fight and possibly die.
As I stated he had a choice, others don't.

 

...and, as stated, you have a choice not to soldier on a given day, with serious consequences, but still a choice.

 

So now in the services you can actually say 'I don't want to fight today but I might tomorrow?'
It's certainly changed from when I was in.

 

Never said anything about "fighting tomorrow". The fact that the vast majority of serviceman do their duty day in, day out does not detract from the fact that they have a choice each time they put themselves in harm's way.

 

I understood what labrum meant.

"Serious consequences" - ie Court Martial on a very serious charge. But still a choice.

We are/were volunteers for service in the forces - it was our choice.

I have no idea what was going on in Gary Speed's head/life - his sad suicide will not have been a rational choice. I really wish people would not put things in such black and white pigeonholes.

I am not a football fan, and know little about Gary Speed, but he was a well-known footballer and recent manager of the Welsh Principality team. As such his passing is newsworthy isn't it?

Edit: Though it took me ages to respond.

 

His death is sad, I deal with death on a daily basis, I just thought the media were a bit OTT that's all. A sign of the times maybe.

By choice I mean to step on the bomb or not step on it, the soldier doesn't get to choose.
Nature of warfare I suppose.
There's no denying he was a popular person and will be missed by many.

As I signed my original post perhaps I'm getting too cynical.
An occupational hazard maybe.

 

Obviously a soldier has no choice other than to stay switched on once on the ground and making that choice in no way guarantees that he will stay safe. But, in deciding to walk out of the FOB / PB gate he has got a choice. If that choice is made committing to the service of others rather than in fear of the consequences of choosing not to go out on patrol then that soldier is being courageous. The parallel with suicide is that thinking clearly at the time is rarely as clear cut and even harder to evidence by anybody.

 

I've dealt with many suicides in the last 27 years, some were cries for help that went wrong, some because they felt there was no other way out of a problem. Quite a few obviously well planned for maximum effect on those they were leaving behind.
Some sadly with no apparent reason or cause but only known to themselves.
But in all cases the only ones really hurt were the loved ones left behind.
Maybe we will never fully understand the workings of the human mind.
There's help out there for everyone, it's just finding the right help that's the hard part.

 

I dont think there is any lines to draw here .Yes the serving man does volunteer ,and yes they are the real heroes !!.I do not class sportsmen do gooder as heroes .But Gary was a well liked and true sportsman .That is my slant on it

 

You're right about the help Rod but I'd argue most don't / can't seek it when they need it. My lad's best mate topped himself a couple of months back and he was the last person to speak to him, he went AWOL for 12 hours and was then found dead. It was obvious from the location that he didn't want to be found / stopped and nobody suspected he would do what he did. Like you say it's those left behind that deal with the pain.

 

This is newsworthy because here is a man who had it all, money, family, job he loved, yet he felt he couldn't deal with life To compare it to the lack of coverage for servicemen/women who die in the line of duty, is way off point, that tragedy is why the media have become so de-sensitised to young men and women paying the ultimate price week in, week out. RIP Gary you were a decent man in a profession which severely lacks that decency.