As i lie here, my mind racing between feelings of abject pain to subliminal pleasure, I cannot but reflect on the events leading up to my demise with a sensation of bewilderment. It all started two days before the new year when quite unexpectedly I was invited to a fancy dress party. Being black I opted for an ironic costume such as a slave, and wish I had stuck with my choice with what transpired later. My two closest friends came up with the idea it being Christmas time to go with a religious theme. John dressed in a very cleaver costume representing mans image of God. Paul dressed in a loin cloth and cape went as Jesus, and I wrapped in white sheet with hood, went as a ghost. Yes there we were , the Holy Trinity, Father, Son, and Holy spirit. For a touch of realism, Paul also made and carried a cross, which although looking big, was made of balsa and cardboard so was quite easy to carry. It was thus dressed the festivities began. What a night, we moved gallons and before we knew it, home beckoned. Alas when John flagged down the Taxi, Paul and myself were not around and the taxi would not wait. John decided to take it and went off without us. So there is Paul and myself walking through Handsworth dressed as a ghost and Jesus with a cross. Upon reaching Paul's home we free his Black Labrador and enter the local park with the dog. I remark to Paul that he still has his cross with him and he tells me its because he wants some pics taken in the park. Where's the camera I ask. So off he goes to fetch it leaving me with the dog and the cross. It is at this point that a gang of what I would describe as undesirable Black Youths appear. The dog runs under my sheet as its frightened. As they approach the dog starts to bite my leg under the sheet. I cry out get away you b.........b*stard, and then things started to go crazy. The gang leader shouts out hey bro's look we got us a real live KKK man and he's on his way to do the biz. What you talking about I say, and the dog sinks his teeth again. Fcuk off I shout, fcuk you shouts the leader and then notices the fcukin cross leaning against a tree. Oh no say I, oh yeah says he and head butts me. Two others hit me with the cross and as its light weight they are disappointed so hit me again with a tree branch, and commence kicking seven bells out of me. Paul returns, sees whats cracking off so calls the police who arrive in minutes. The gang does one, I manage to get my hood off. The police have been briefed that a load of Black men are causing trouble in the park, they arrive and see me unhooded and black. Guess what, yeah, and now as I type and the feeling starts to creep back into my body I think, what shall I go as next year?