Who are they? Why are they here? What do they want? Are they carrying foreign diseases? Do they have passports? Will they ship their aged relatives into Byker and jump the housing queue? Who designed their Gilbert and Sullivan uniforms? Do we have aircraft carriers shadowing them? Why are there six 'trawlers' parked off of the mouth of the Tyne with no nets on deck? Do they have submarines under the river? Are they here for the fishing? Is it a naval flash-mob? And who gave them permission to park on my fucking river?