first time a cold caller has made me laugh ...

Disconnect the internet and the phone rings almost instantly. A young lad introduces himself and says he is calling from ... Acorn Stairlifts ... I laugh so much it's the first time one of them apologises for calling ...

Not quite got to that stage yet ... or has someone put in a complaint about my performance :???: :???: :???:
 
golden_rivet said:
Disconnect the internet and the phone rings almost instantly. A young lad introduces himself and says he is calling from ... Acorn Stairlifts ... I laugh so much it's the first time one of them apologises for calling ...

Not quite got to that stage yet ... or has someone put in a complaint about my performance :???: :???: :???:
Don't you have them on the outside of submarine conning towers so the sailors can ride up to get inside? :wink: :lol: :grin:
 

FlagWagger

GCM
Book Reviewer
golden_rivet said:
Disconnect the internet and the phone rings almost instantly. A young lad introduces himself and says he is calling from ... Acorn Stairlifts ... I laugh so much it's the first time one of them apologises for calling ...
Getting registered with the Telephone Preference Service will stop most cold calls (after about 6-8 weeks); its also quite funny to hear a cold caller squirm when you start asking little things like their name, company, etc and then advise that you're asking since you're registered with TPS - 9 times out of 10 they hung up on me!
 

TerryB

Badgeman
I usually ask them if they have been saved and would they like me tell them how to preserve their mortal souls.Funnily they normally hang up very quickly.
 
I tend to try to drag the conversation out then mention if county court judgements and bankruptcy would cause any problems I find it a shame that they hang up on me, bloody bad manners. I`ve now started to ask them for their home phone number and that I`ll call them later, when they wont give it to me i ask why not? after all they are calling me at home, again , Bloody bad manners hanging up.
 

dondon

MIA
They can't understand my accent no more than I can understand theres , though I dont tend to get many of them after registering with the phone preference service & the mail preference service , worked wonders it has , only shite mail I get now is from Royal Mail so that goes straight back in there post box when I go down the square ,
 

UncleAlbert

War Hero
I`m pretty well protected from cold callers but sometimes they get me…and when they do I always give them a minute of my time and try to let them down lightly.
I know that they’re a pain but the bottom line is they are doing a dead end, unskilled job and not claiming off the state….also you don’t know who you’re talking to….it may be a thalidomide a dyslexic or an ex bootneck in a wheelchair.

So next time you’re cornered, cut erm a bit of slack and be polite…after all they`re paying for the call.



…….
 

sgtpepperband

War Hero
Book Reviewer
Tell them it's not your house but you can go and get the homeowner. Then put the phone down somewhere and leave it on the hook. It'll cost them more than it's costing you!

:lol:
 
I havn't tried this, but I've been assured that it works.

Do you ever get those annoying phone calls with no one on the other end?

What you can do after answering, if you notice there is no-one there, is to immediately start hitting your # button on the phone, 6 or 7 times as quickly as possible. This confuses the machine that dialed the call and it kicks your number out of their system.
 
I suppose my answer to them depends on what they're calling for. If it's windows/kitchens etc I tell them I live in Married quarters which puts them off straight away.
If its some friendly chap from bombay who can hardly speak english I normally make up some excuse (so thanks to all for the hints) but the ones that really get me is the fella from bombay who comments on the weather as an openning line!!! he's got a computer infront of him telling the weather for which ever part of the uk he's phoning, so when he says "it's nice and sunny today" I say "what you talking about it's p1ssing down/snowing etc" then wonder if the next person he phones is baffled to be told its snowing when it's a lovely hot day.
 

slim

War Hero
Had a cold caller the other day trying to get me to sue someone for an accident that I may or may not have had in the past. This suing culture is one of the things which really p!sses me off, school trips are becoming a thing of the past, children's play equipment being removed and lots more. Just because the authorities are afraid of being sued. Afraid that I lost my cool and told the caller to Foxtrot Oscar. Phone went dead for some reason.
 

sgtpepperband

War Hero
Book Reviewer
If they're cold calling about doors/windows/conservatories and you're particularly bored, string them along. Ask for everything, all the extras, whatever they suggest. They'll spend hours doing the measurements, giving you massively reduced quotes ('special discount for this area...' etc.).

And when they hand over a contract for you to sign your life away (remember to ask about the 14-day 'cooling off period'), ask if they can do the frames... in yellow. Or red. Or whatever you can think of to make it inconvenient! Then watch the scrote try to redeem himself and claw back whatever credibility he has to finish the deal, because he's a greedy git driven by the potential lost commission!
 

Salty_Dog

Badgeman
golden_rivet said:
Disconnect the internet and the phone rings almost instantly. A young lad introduces himself and says he is calling from ... Acorn Stairlifts ... I laugh so much it's the first time one of them apologises for calling ...

Not quite got to that stage yet ... or has someone put in a complaint about my performance :???: :???: :???:
Get one. They're great...

 
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