First day back

Discussion in 'Diamond Lil's' started by seenoffteefcuk, Jan 5, 2010.

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  1. Its 1 degrees c in the office.
    The civvies i work with just dont understand me.
    The pipes have broken so cant even get a cuppa.
    Ive got a 2 week hangover.
    Im skint.
    My Mam is a civvy.
    My dad is a civvy.
    Fcuk im a civvy.
    And my cats a fcuking muslim.
    I think il just fcuk off to my flat and have some alone time with spankwire.
  2. NY blues mate...

    What you need is one of these 8O
  3. I started back yesterday and lost my temper within half an hour and today is even worse.

    I am sat here freezing becasue where i live there is about 6/7inches of snow. So i got out my wellies and walked to work, job done. I get here to find out that no other twat has bothered and are sat at home :twisted: !

    To make things worse, i went to the gym last night and couldn't get on much because of all the new posers that start after christmas and don't even break sweat. I wanted to to kill.

    Please forgive me if i post today and seem a little short tempered :roll: .
  4. Don't bottle it up mate; share your violent inner thoughts and reduce the risk of appearing in court again:
  5. Living in London I feel your pain. Everytime I even attempt a gym session its either fat fcuking housewives who'd lose more weight if they walked their fat kids to school instead of hogging the rowing machines doing a workout that consists of two strokes followed by five minutes getting their breath back. The weights room is even worse where you have a room full of steroid riddled freaks eye fcuking one another in the wall mirror, if you cnuts want to pull each other go to a gay club!
  6. Agreed! At my gym, the upstairs is for running, rowing and fat birds to have a chat and the downstairs is for grown men to shag eachother and flirt.
  7. I had a great first day back at work actually. I took some guns up the range, stood in the snow and shot some stuff until I got too cold, then I went to the club house had a coffee and a bacon butty and sat in front of the fire stroking a labrador. Then I went outside again and shot some more stuff, then I gave the guns to 'my man' who cleaned them for me. After that I went home and had wild sex with my missus in our four poster bed while my cat watched.

    Actually this is pretty much what I do everyday.

    Edited to add: I did lose one of my gloves though so that is a bit of a fucker.
  8. That used to be my daily regime (without the bumming of your missus element you'll be please to know)! Taking your dog to work, shooting guns all day and drinking coffee by the litre. Happy days! Shooting in the snow is great and makes the whole affair much quieter!
  9. Indeed. Life is good. 8)
  10. Envying the stroking of a labrador in front of a fire bit.
  11. Barstewards
  12. Thought this was a euphemism...

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