Discussion in 'Diamond Lil's' started by BillyNoMates, May 2, 2015.

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  1. 8:00 AM this morning and my living room was on fire a bit. WolfPack lit one of those oil burner things that heat up aromatic oil, but she used TWO FUCKING TEA CANDLES to heat up the oil in the bowl and, as a consequence.....the oil went whoosh and set £300 worth of Next wall mirror frame alight. She's in the shower and I'm having a lie in when the alarms all went off in a bunch. Came downstairs yelled a bit and put the fire out. Commenced smoke clearance and admired the sooty as fuck deckhead.....time to clean everything methunk.

    The time is now 14:15 and I have just finished a living room re-paint....I have THE
    biggest wendy on ever. No more oil burners in this gaff.....all gone in the bin.

    Still, things could have been worse. It could have been my fault. Where was I when the Royal Sprog was being dropped? Trying to stop my fucking house burning down - that's where.
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  2. Glad it wasn't worse matey. Away for a pint,you earned it.;)
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  3. Too much to do. There's black shite all over the place.....and by that I mean smoke damage!

    Now on with the gloss!

    Thanks for caring by the by.

  4. Commiserations on the hassle. But as long as no-one was hurt then you can always repair damage.

    And whilst on the bright side, if you behave in a saintly and forgiving way you can milk this for what it is worth whilst not letting her forget.........I would estimate at least two paralytic benders before you start getting the usual ear-ache.
  5. Your sense of humour failure is justified. Good job its a Bank Holiday, you should get 1 days chillin. Just glad no one was hurt.
  6. And take WPL's Fire Safety badge away. Promptly.
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  7. Glad no-one's hurt.
    I'm impressed that you can put a fire out just by yelling at it a bit :eek:
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  8. 17:20

    Had enough for one day. Besides I'm working this Sunday and Monday and Tuesday and Wednesday.

    Life is definitely not a bowl of cherries or a box'a'chocklits.

    Place still smells of smoke although it's scented with aloe vera so I am feeling somewhat chilled out at the momennnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn......
  9. You could try one of those scented candle things to take the smell away.....:p
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  10. Did wolfpack leader man (woman) the fire wall whilst you were firefighting?
  11. A useful addition to the BNM household would be an FB5X and a large can of oxblood......
  12. Were you water wall, jet spray or just B&Q pistol garden watering thingy? You could have borrowed my diving gear for the rear (ooops Freudian slip!) entry!

    Glad everything was OK, Lucky it was only a Next mirror......
  13. I got a clip for saying that many moons ago.

    "dogs are put out sonny...fires are extinguished"
    -some hairy arsed Chief Stoker circa 1996
  14. D
    Used a few damp tea towels. and the stand-by extinguisher I have for the kitchen.
    WolfPackLeader now has the honour of cleaning up everywhere else today......I'm


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