Excuse To Finish The Other Half!!!

Discussion in 'Diamond Lil's' started by Murph, Apr 3, 2010.

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  1. Evening guys and gals.

    Heres the situation.
    Been with my misses almost 6 months and to be honest im bored, and wanting to finish it in the most not evil way possible....asking some of you for some excuses will be funny but hey ho, its the first place I look for advise. :D
    Im wanting to be a single man when I enter the Mob, spreading my seed in every port possible :p
    Looking forward to your responses.
  2. "Your sister/mum gives better head"
  3. Say you think she needs to lose a few pounds, im sure it'll all be over in an instant after the words leave your mouth, and hey presto. You didnt dump her, so you dont need to feel bad ;)
  4. Or to really end it:

    "Your brother/dad gives better head"
  5. Serious question?
  6. With serious replies, Sol.
  7. It's in Diamond Lil's so who gives a fuck?
  8. "I have gonnorhoea"
  9. Yes serious question :D But the replies are rather humorous.

    I did think of :

    Its not you its me.......................whos ending this relationship because I cant stand the fu&*ing sight of you.
  10. I like it.
  11. Tell her you're pregnant, that should scare her off.

    Alternatively, start wearing her clothes to go places.

    Also, you could always not delete your browsing history, and hope she stumbles across this thread, unless you look at some REALLY odd stuff online...
  12. I need to tell you..............the last 17 times that I have fucked you I have been thinking of ..............at work sorry but I would love to shag dat gal
  13. Be honest with her... just tell her you're gay !! :wink:
  14. "Dear baby, welcome to Dumpsville....population......you"
  15. Become a nudist and invite her friends round for nudist parties that will soon get rid of her.

    Be horrible to her best friend.......They all listen to their friends and will soon be persuaded by best friend to get someone she really deserves. Who knows how to treat a girl properly blah blah blah :roll:
  16. when you join up
  17. when you join up give her your address HMS Ganges shotley
  18. Blackrat

    Blackrat War Hero Moderator Book Reviewer

    Take her down the pub after arranging to meet some Lil's regulars. Get her pissed out of her mind (however, i hear there are deals on Rohypnol these days) and say to her "My dear. I'm just popping down the road to buy some fags. Will you be ok with Monty, 2DD and Jonno while i'm gone?"

    Problem solved.

  19. And when you return from the pub and find Monty 2DD and Jonno thus:-


    Problem solved :D :wink:
  20. Blackrat

    Blackrat War Hero Moderator Book Reviewer

    Rummers. Step way from Google. Immediately.

    Where can you get those pants? I quite like them

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