I am clearly not alone in this. You know what i mean, when you should have had a bit of a think before you've either said or done something. I've probably put my foot in my mouth more than a gathering of new born babies that are hungry. I remember once showing a sprog around the Squadron. While walking across the sports field, the Adjutant rode by on a bike, wearing civvies. Now the sprog, who had not long ago been with the Adj sorting some shit or the other out, cracked off a superb salute. "Easy tiger" i said, "You don't have to salute the fucker". I then heard the screech of brakes as the Adj came to a halt. "So, i'm a fucker am i?" he said between gritted teeth. Another time is when i was in the NAAFI heavily on the piss one Monday evening. On Mondays, they would have bingo. Now the guy from HQ Squadron who ran this oddly popular pastime was ill, so someone asked a very drunk Blackrat if he would oblige doing the bingo calling. Now i didn't have a clue about all this clickety click up your arse bollocks, so decided to make it up. It went something like this; "On it's own because it's a no mates shitcunt - Four" "Two fat NAAFI slags - Eighty eight" "Five and seven - twelve" A riot nearly ensued. So much so, the Orderly Officer was called to the pigs bar to calm things down. After promising to behave and to call the numbers correctly, the OO moved to the back of the NAAFI when low and behold, he hears over the microphone; "Number of blokes queuing up to bum the cunt of an Orderly Officer because he's a bandit - sixty two". A not so pleasant night in the guardroom followed. As for doing things without engaging my brain, i was working on the battery bank in the back of a land rover when i thought it would be a good idea to drop the adjustable spanner over the positive and negative terminals. The resulting spark and bang not only scared the shit out of me, but ensured my pockets were considerably lighter for busting MoD property through being a twat.. Anyone else display such fuckwittery which can, quite frankly, be avoided?