Darwin Award Contender/

Discussion in 'Diamond Lil's' started by hobbit, Nov 13, 2006.

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  1. Under the title,Ring of Fire, the national rag in Oz reported the following'

    Sunderland ,England;
    A man was taken to hospital with severe burns to his backside after he tried an ill-advised method of launching a firework last week. The 22 year old was enjoying Britain's annual Guy Fawkes celebration and decided to launch a Black Cat Thunderbolt Rocket from his bottom.Paramedics attending the scene found the man badly injured with the firework still lodged in his colon.

  2. What else could you expect from a Makkem? :?

  3. I too was working on bonfire night in said occupation. Luckily i didn't have to deal with any burns. I always seem to get little kiddies who manage to pull hot kettles onto themselves and i can tell you it's bloody unsetting. A female mate of mine has has a spate of men who have had their scroats ripped open by football/rugby injuries etc. She was also called to a bloke in the bath at what she best described as a swingers party who had had a catheter probe shoved up his japs eye rather too far during a kinky sex act. My unsympathetic friend asked him what she was supposed to do about it as it was bleeding profusely!!
  4. Sadly, the cretin in the original post cannot be considered for a Darwin Award because he didn't manage to kill himself, thereby helping human evolution along by failing to contribute his idiot gene to the gene pool.

    Still, if he managed to blast his balls off he might be up for a special award, since without those he'd be unlikely to be breeding any more little idiots.
  5. At least it is likely to protect the human race for a while from his genes, and perhaps give him time to perfect his exit.

  7. Good 'un all the same.
  8. He only behaved in the Forces tradition of behaving like a loony, it's people like him that get VC's.
  9. Nah, it's people RESCUING loonies like him that get the VCs!!!!
  10. Actually, that wouldn't qualify as Darwin as it is reasonable that the individual concerned would not have the necessary knowledge not to carry out that action, as it is not blindingly obvious that the rail is live (which he did not experience in his home country) in comparison to one that is not (which is what he is used to and would assume to apply to all rails he encountered). Even the presence of wires over the track and being told it was because the "trains are electric" would not mean he had the technical knowledge that the track must also be live for it to operate.

    This one is quote a good example for my professional life on the dangers of cultural assumptions being used as a hazard control measure of what people will and will not do.
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  11. Get busy with the new signs then Dredd. PASSENGERS ARE ADVISED THAT LISTENING FOR THE TRAIN VIA THE THIRD RAIL IS PROHIBITTED. About 40 different languages should be sufficient.
  12. Not the point Fishhead. What I was saying is that the fatality was as a result of a cultural difference, not stupidity.

    Warning signs need only be in English, and show the electrical signal, same as for a power sub-station. Danger of death. Right next to the sign telling you not to cross the lines or face a fine for trespass. Job jobbed.

    Of course, if the sign is already there and was wilfully ignored . . . then Darwinism will apply.
  13. There are no signs banning passengers from riding on the roof of the carriages or clinging to the outside of the train either but no-one does be they home grown Brit or johnnie-come-lately.
  14. Tracks with overhead catenary conductors do not have 'live' rails, only the third rail system in use on the old Southern Region has a 'live' rail.
  15. OK. Thanks.
  16. Regarding signs, we've used words and pictures for years; railway signs.jpg How complicated is that?
    It doesn't really add to understanding, though, when the idiot type Mail shows article-2544087-00541C0500000258-479_634x394.jpg as the "death rail". OK, it is if your on it at the same time as the train.

    Anyway, it's a shame that the poor little bugger learnt the hard way.
  17. Technically, the deceased has not learned anything. As he is now brown bread.

    But hopefully others will have . . .
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