Crap at marching

Discussion in 'Diamond Lil's' started by WreckerL, Jun 29, 2009.

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  1. this sort of thing happens more thane they like to admit. ammo boots are notoriously slippery and can happen to the best of them (always good to see them bought down a peg or two though) :twisted: :twisted:
  2. In the late 60's the ship I was serving in was the British rep at the Cannes film festival, along with the French, Septics, Belgians, and German,s.

    Each ship put a guard out on the festival building doors, in rotation.
    On our night me and my oppo were braced up like a pair of peacock's,.. full No6's, boots and gaiters belts, the ish.
    We had been told to give a butt salute to everyone coming in.
    As the evening progressed, we were getting lashed up to fcuk by all and every one, and Wally my oppo is becoming really p*ssed, so that when (I think it was Tatum O'Neil) comes up he drops his trolleys and gives her a real butt salute.
    The septics are going crusty about the RN being amateur's and ill disciplined animals.
    Skipper not at all impressed and tells us, wally 7 day's Nines.

    Next night Septics show us how its done, except,...................................
    Step is nice and clean outside hall, and just to make sure, two stokers have given it a real good polish.
    Septic snaps to attention, skids across step, goes careering forwards straight off step into crowd, ...grabs at someone to break fall tears off a geezers shirt,.... rips a dress front open and puts a bird in hospital with cracked ribs when he lands on top.
    Next night French stay at bottom of steps and all is well.
    Daily orders contain a warning about the use of any polish aboard except Glift and Gleam. :oops: :oops: :D
  3. [align=center]absolutely bloody brilliant. wish i could have seen it. lmfao
    :lol: :twisted: :lol: [/align]
  4. I would rather my misses or granny caught me shagging a bloke than have that happen to me.
  5. :lol: PMSL :lol:

    PS: There was me thinking Glift n Gleem were only used on teak messdecks in Suffolk....
  6. PMSL Just a shame they never had mobiles or youtube in those days :D :D Love to have seen the look on the septic CO's face
  7. They did have mobile recording devices in those days.... just they were a bit bigger...


    Some of us here may remember using one, back in the days that 5 minutes worth of 8mm film cost £5, at a time when £60 a week was a good weekly wage! :oops: :oops: :oops: My first, secondhand, Bolex camera cost me a fortnight's wages! 8O
  8. Steve
    You would have been better off spending the cash on getting your own Bolex repaired :p
  9. It was the POME's face that needed picturing, I've never seen anyone look so proud of his hands.
    It was a real "Coupe for the purple empire, and we sandscratchers had a lot of catch up after that. :D :D :D
  10. The RN Medical Branch used to be inordinately proud at being crap at marching; our marching tune was "See them shuffling along". Marching is for brain-washed Percies and the King's Squad (?) RAF.
  11. Just before CONQUEROR commissioned at Birkenhead, some bright spark sent us to the RMR in Morpeth Dock for marching instruction. Bit strange, because all we had to do was march on, stand still during the ceremony and march off - 200 yards in total. The Marine DI (my next door neighbour) ranted and raved, screamed and yelled but the shuffling mob managed to arrive at approximately the same time or adjacent, without semblance of any smartness or order.
    At home that night, he was moaning to his missus about wasting his time that day, and ending "When I asked them about boots, they said "steaming boots, Royal ? - got'em on."
    Needless to say, on the appointed day, we covered the 200 yards in a manner even a GI would smile at.
  12. Matelots dont march,they bimble!
  13. Looks like some kind of invisible midget axe kick, since when have guardsmen been taught taekwondo?
  14. Surely the Queen's Colour Squadron RAF Reg!! 8O
    The Kings Squad is the latest bunch of Nods to pass out of CTCRM, every 2 weeks there's a new 'un.
  15. Correct mate although i just got my lid handed to me by the memorial with a handshake from the camp commandant!!!

    The funniest thing was watching "Rubbers" trying to prepare for November ceremonies, could we march?? Not fcuking likely although i never did pride myself with being anything other than a field soldier!!
  16. You were lucky mate Kings Squad in January is no joke!! Harry icers wind blowing in off the Exe and I must have arsed over more times on the Parade Ground due to the AP Boots/ice ratio in that week than I ever had prangs on owt else at Lympstone. :lol:
    Luckily for Royal, we do sensible drill none of this lifting the knee at halts or rapid tick tock marching of the Guards/Perce.
  17. And it was soooo ferkin frustrating rod-gearing,i used to get headaches trying to drill jack ( and somtimes jenny),funniest was when the left arm and left leg march ( or bimble ) in unisan,i have had to turn my back on the squad a few times and have a little giggle to myself, :salute:

  18. March like a Clockwork Orange, "Cockwork Orangeing"
  19. Had I been a GI/Missileman/AWW, much as I would imagine the weaponry side would have been interesting and fulfilling, I really don't think I could get excited about the walking up and down and shouting bit.

    I always enjoyed the military training side of things but, standfast the early days at Raleigh, could never get into all that divisions stuff.

    Then again, I suppose standing still for a living is pretty easy money.

    Just a view like.

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