Discussion in 'Diamond Lil's' started by Ja5on, Oct 19, 2009.
The heart of the site is the forum area, including:
Who will be the first to buy and try?
Oddly enough, the RAF have been doing that for years.
In my younger days when i was a ripped God, i would, on a frequent basis, get lucky in London with an impressionable young Dame who would believe the shite i would spout about me being the best soldier in christendom. Being the perfect gent that i am, i would oblige them when they would tell me "Not to spaff in me mouth as i can't stand the taste". Come morning, i would offer to make breakfast (at their gaff of course) and this would usually be scrambled eggs.
"How were your eggs my dear?" i would ask
"Lovely Blackrat. Nicest eggs i've had. What's your secret?" The doting one night stand would reply
"The secret is natural yoghurt" i would say
"Really? I didn't know i had any" Would be the usual reply
"You didn't. It was bollock yoghurt. Got a taxi number?"
I have to ask.
How did you find that site?
What the fuck were you looking for when you found it?
"Scambled Eggs for Kings"
it was through another site they have all the weird and incredible stuff from around the world on there.
No wonder when i googled "Impossible Insertions" it didn't throw up any links to the SAS tree jumpers in Malaya.
Time for me to go home see you tommorrow fellow to$$ers
That is wrong on soooooo many levels 8O
What? Ja5on going home? Everyone's gotta be somewhere.
Ahh Blackrat, might have known I would find you lurking in this thread!
How well you know me already m'dear. 8)
Just when you think you've seen it all. Genius.
Imagine doing a dinner for 20 people! 8O
Could be tricky. Especially if Bronski Beat, George Michael and Holly Johnson were on the guest list.
Never used it as an ingredient in cooking (snow-balling my own with a filthy norwegian optometrist doesn't count).
The only thing I've found it is good for is gluing my hand to my chest after an inebriated late night wank. Waking up in the early hours thinking my arm is paralysed and spending 5 minutes with a kitchen spatula prying my hand off my body is testament to it's chemical weld properties.
Edited for spelling
P'raps you could go on 'Dragon's Den' and sell it as a new, solvent free, environmentally-friendly adhesive :wink:
Already been done judging by some of the w@nkers they get on there
Just seen the cover of the book. I'm going to say but I reckon most of you (male) are thinking it
Whoever spaffed on top of that Blancmange needs desperately to attend a GIU Clinic
Showing yer age Blackrat - Welcome to Rum Rats by the way
Aparently Some supermarkets have been reading this thread and are going to stock the main ingredient.
Here is a picture from The Sainsbury Economy Cum Factory
And here is the one from Marks and Spencers free range cum factory
Spike Milligan in The Last Goon Show of All
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