Discussion in 'Diamond Lil's' started by Stirling, Apr 16, 2011.

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  1. On the return leg of my ramming speed walk today I was getting a bit of a sweat on so removed my T-Shirt, some young chav shouted ''Oi, Skeletor'', compliments indeed.
    After showering I stepped on the scales, yep the chav was right, now down to 10st 5lbs.
    Target weight is 10st 8lbs so went to Morrisons and bought a flatbread and some ethnic sausages ( ask Rummers ) having troffed that lot I got back on the scales, 10st 7lbs. Best not go for a crap for a day or 2 to maintain that.
  2. lol im down to 11 8
    go you!
  3. Since my dog died last month and therefore no walkies every day I've put on over half a stone :cry:
  4. Im at 13st 7lbs, down from 14 and half. Aiming to gt back to 12st 5lbs which is the weight I was when I was back at uni and fit n healthy. Getting there slowly but surely
  5. I am 6'-1'' so bit of a racing snake, according to Angry Doc blood pressure testing apparatus is a bit hit and miss but the last time I had it tested first reading was 112/70 and the second was 105/70 so an average of about 109/70, not bad for a 59 year old.
    Resting heart rate is 49 which according to this resting heart rate chart, for calculating your heart rate I am athlete status..:laughing2::laughing2::laughing2:

  6. WreckerL

    I am really sorry to hear about your dog.

    It takes time to go over losing a pet, but when you are feeling better, there is bound to be a suitable dog at the local rehoming centre which would love to come to a caring home and you could get back out there doing the walks and getting back into shape.
  7. My dog was worth 2.1/2 Stone over 18 months. still not shifted it 8 years latter.
  8. After years of training I still have not achieved my height for weight.I was hoping to be about 8' 6" by now but alas, still only 6' 3"
  9. The cause of my weight gain, p'raps I should eat less now he's gone!
  10. Cute mutt mate, they are so giving during their relatively short lives so the loss is always hard to take, making the decision to get another even harder.
  11. Much missed and not to be replaced, he was the only one who ever did what I said :cry: (but not always)
  12. I suppose being a tightfisted bastard, you are eating the dog food you bought in bulk, as well as your own rations.
    It's a proven scientific fact that most men start to gain height horizontally after their 55th birthday.
    And Stirling monitoring heat rates and blood pressure is for girls, real men just have the heart attack.:-D

    I shall be doing an ethnic sausage run very shortly, and will bring with me a very traditional Birmingham dish. Curry and chips.(with beer naturally). The local sausage we produce, are licensed under the toxic waste, and dangerous substances act.
    Being caught with an unlicensed staffordshire sausage is a serious offense.
    I am however very partial to Stirling's ethnic sausage, it went down a treat with a fried egg and a cup of coffee.
  13. I've got a load of "Baker's original" pooch food left over for your bangers if you need them Rummers. They're crap in sarnies as they keep falling out. Your not having the Bonio's though, they're delicious.
  14. Sorry we havn't been introduced wrekert.I'm new to this,but are you passing a message on, overweight by 1/2 a stone ,now the dogs gone? Does this mean you ate the feekin thing?
  15. I could never catch him!! I'm not overweight yet,I'm still within the band for my height but I'm heading that way. Back to stalking I guess.
  16. When I had a dog & I was buying a large bag of Winalot in Tesco and was standing in the queue at the till.

    A woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

    On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Winalot Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because
    I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward
    with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

    I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and the way that it works is to load your trouser pockets with
    Winalot nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete
    so I was going to try it again.

    I have to mention here that practically everyone in the queue was by now enthralled with my story, particularly
    a guy who was behind her.

    Horrified, she asked if I'd ended up in the hospital in that condition because I had been poisoned. I told her no,
    it was because I'd been sitting in the road licking my balls and a car hit me.

    I thought one guy was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard as he staggered out the door.

    Stupid cow..........why else would I buy dog food?
  17. Ate the friggin dog? how stupid. He'd have to be a short dodgy looking fucker with shifty slanted eyes and.......
    hang on a mo,............did you eat the fuckin dog Wrecks?
  18. I'm not saying too much as the war office about and I'm in the shit as it is but,...
    sometimes when she opens certain tins of cat food, well it smells better than what I'm gettin.
    When she opens other tins, it smells just LIKE what I am getting. ( looking around nervously)
  19. Yeah but...

    A Pakistani walks into a shop and asks for twenty tins of dog food.
    The shop owner tells him to fuck off as he knows Pakistanis don't keep dogs but they do eat dog food.
    Show me twenty dogs you get the food is the proposition put forward by the shopkeeper.
    Ten mins later the Pakistani is back with ten dogs.
    Next day he comes back and asks for ten tins of cat food.
    Pakistanis eat cat food he's told, show me the cats you get the food.
    Back he comes ten mins later with ten cats and is served the food.
    Next day the Pakistani comes back with a big box.
    Please putting your hand in box he says to the shopkeeper.
    The shopkeepers duly obliges, shoves his hand in the box then pulls it out immediately covered in shit.
    Ten toilet rolls please says the Pakistani.
    Boom boom.
  20. Nowt else to do now I no longer drink........................

    Be nice to finally meet you ( on your last visit you met a clone, the Mk 4 version which is perfect in every detail right down to the nose and ear hair.) I am away on the IOW from the 6th to 15th of June when I will no doubt visit the Aukland to meet one of the locals.

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