Cash for honours

It seems as if anyone who has made a substantial donation to political party funds may be investigated in the cash for honours scandal.
Personally like many other matelots believe that I have given substantial amounts of my hard earned cash to both the labour party & conservative party. This was done by drinking copious quantities of alcohol in their social clubs (plenty of cheap booze and extended hours before all day opening came in). I believe that I and many others of my ilk are long overdue for an elevation to the peerage. I have my name picked out already:

Lord Slim of Bugis street

What name are you claiming?

 

Lord Nozzer de Walt of Civvy Street

 

Lord Ling of Nana Plaza
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