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Can you cheat at Ukkers?


Lantern Swinger
What are you some kind of six throwing, Timber Shifting, Suck Back Waffu?? :twisted: :twisted:

Of course you can cheat, you can cheat at anything, but, you will get caught. :wink:


Cheating is perfectly acceptable in uckers, as long as you get away with it!

If your opponant is dumb enough to look away and be distracted, then it's his fault that you out-piece without a six or blob up without the numbers.

However, if you are caught by your opponant, then you must immediately say "oops sorry, your right!" and not argue (yeah right!).

Cheating is what makes it such a great spectator sport!

Deleted 7

What you do is make a diversion scene and wipe out everything.

Or maybe that is why no one ever played Ukkers with me!
Right, there are three golden rules to uckers...

1) Ease on a double,
2) Split on a six,
3) Cheat like fuck!

Hope that clears things up.

PS In our mess an 'up-board' is considered a technical 8-piecing and subject to your details being entered on the flip-side regardless! Very unsporting behaviour.


no cheats at mah jong,off topic.
the trouble I had logging in here was fn unbelieveable,cookiies all sorted out.


Lantern Swinger
I was watching a game last week where one player got away with easing over and blobbing up in front of an oponents blob. The opponent didn't notice the move (doh!) and was setting themselves up for a mixi... the sepctators kept quite for a bit, but eventually their comments brought the game to a halt and forced an explanation and admission. Resetting the pieces was a challange a bit like that faced by a Snooker Referee after a bit misshit... but great entertainment value!!!


Cheating at Uckers is absolutely essential. The easiest way is to get someone to distract your opponent and then gently timber shift.


Being a Perc, who was introduced to the dark arts by a MT in Bosnia, I didnt get much of that Jackspeak! But it sounded good to me, wondered why the missus always wins! (Cheating cow!)


Lantern Swinger
great memories timber shifting , mixys ,suck back , out piece ddid everyone have a grand unveiling of the new uckers board for the trip ?? where do all the old boards end up?
Think all the old boards are that worn they just ditch them .

Great game though you can timbershift cheat like fcuk but you still have to be able to throw sixes!!
The Uckers Board from the S+S Mess after the Newcastle decommissioned ended up round my place. And I agree with Fighting_Sailor, up-tabling is a technical 8-piecing!


I always thought that the titles of 'Six Throwing, Ludo Playing, Timber shifting number throwing c***' were properly earned titles of masterdom of the game - because whoever you were playing, they were better than you and you couldn't have won by fair means.
andym said:
I just recieved a brand new uckers Board for my Birthday.Its a cracker with a Hall of shame on the back.Very well made,nice bit of kit.It may be had from

Not plugging the site just letting you know.

Call me sad if you want, but I made my own! :oops: I now 8-piece the wife on a regular basis although she closes the fun-park if I'm caught timber-shifting! :roll:

Got to keep in practise during a shore draft to the spreadsheet factory. :wink: