Buying a horse


Book Reviewer
A dwarf with a lisp goes into a stud farm, "I'd like to buy a horth"he
says to the owner of the farm.
"What sort of horse?" said the owner.
"A female horth" the dwarf replies.
So the owner shows him a mare.
"Nithe horth." says the dwarf, "Can I thee her eyeth?"
So the owner picks up the dwarf to show him the horses eyes.
"Nithe eyeth.", says the dwarf, "Can I thee her teeth?"
Again the owner picks up the dwarf to show him the horses teeth.
"Nithe teeth.... can I see her eerth?" the dwarf says.
The owner is getting fed up but again picks up the dwarf to show him
horses ears.
"Nithe eerth.' He says, "Now...can I see her twot?"
With this the owner picks the dwarf up by the scruff of his neck and
shoves his head
deep inside the horse's v*gina. He holds him there for a couple of
before pulling him out and putting him down.
The dwarf shakes his head and says:

"Perhaps I should weefwaze that. Can I see her wun awound?"


Book Reviewer
Rabbie Burns' Ode to the Terrorists

'Twas doon by Inch o'Abbots
Oor Jonny walked one day
When he saw a sicht that troubled him
Far more than he could say
A fanatic muslim b'stard
Wiz doin what he'd planned.
And intae Glesca's departure hall
A Cherokee he'd rammed.

A big Glaswegian polis
Came forward tae assist.
He thocht "a wumman driver"
Or at least someone half pissed
But tae his shock nae druken Jock
Emerged to grasp his hand
But a flaming Arab loony
Frae Al Qaeda' evil band.

The mad Islamist nut-case
Had set hissel' on fire
And swung oot at the polis
GBH his clear desire.
Now that's nae richt wur Jonny cried
And sailed intae the fray.
A left hook and a heid butt
Required to save the day.

Now listen up Bin Laden
Yir sort's nae wanted here
For imported English radicals
Us Scotsmen huv nae fear.
Oor hame grown Glesca Asians
Will have nae bliudy truck
So tak yer worldwide Jihad
An' get yersel' tae F***.

Anon (fir noo)


Book Reviewer
Wife sends me there frequently, but not to the re union. Hopefully one year. I'm still working, part time, at the moment.

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