Brit murders his own kids and escapes on ROLLER SKATES!!

tiddlyoggy

War Hero
Book Reviewer
#1
Been on the news today, a tragic crime, but he made his escape on roller skates! Does that make him the campest murderer ever? SPB have you ever been involved in a high speed pursuit with a suspect on such a means of transport or a skateboard perhaps?
 

sgtpepperband

War Hero
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Book Reviewer
#2
Not yet, but I'm sure it will happen... :oops: :wink:

I did hear the one about an elderly homeless man who would go into a branch of Boots and help himself to beauty products, sneaking bottles of shower gel, shaving foam and many bottles of shampoo into his coat pockets (his hair was long and unkempt, I believe). After one trip too many, he was arrested for shoplifting and conveyed to the local bridewell.

During interview, he was asked the usual questions about the alleged offence, such as why did he do it? What compelled him to steal shampoo, when he could've taken something more valuable?

With a flourish, he flicked his hair over his shoulders and declared with all seriousness: "Because I'm worth it..." :lol:
 

sgtpepperband

War Hero
Moderator
Book Reviewer
#4
I think he probably was! Bound over with a night in the 5-Bar Hotel and released with a hot cup of Bovril in the morning... :wink:
 
#5
I once chased a bag snatcher who grabbed an elderly womans bag and tried to escape using a skate board, I honestly cannot understand why he thought he could get away on a skate board but i got back the womans bag and i gave the bag snatcher 2 choices 1. phone up the police or 2. receive a kicking, he choice the 2nd option.
 

tiddlyoggy

War Hero
Book Reviewer
#6
I once chased a bag snatcher who grabbed an elderly womans bag and tried to escape using a skate board, I honestly cannot understand why he thought he could get away on a skate board but i got back the womans bag and i gave the bag snatcher 2 choices 1. phone up the police or 2. receive a kicking, he choice the 2nd option.
He choice second option eh? Good thing this didn't happen just after the rozzers had chucked your trainers in the oggin else he'd have got clean away!
 

tiddlyoggy

War Hero
Book Reviewer
#8
In France. His nationality is only relevant because the French are revving up the outrage bus that a bloody immigrant has commited a foul crime.:laughing4:
 
#9
I once chased a bag snatcher who grabbed an elderly womans bag and tried to escape using a skate board, I honestly cannot understand why he thought he could get away on a skate board but i got back the womans bag and i gave the bag snatcher 2 choices 1. phone up the police or 2. receive a kicking, he choice the 2nd option.
To be fair a skateboard is far quicker than running if you are an able rider and easier to dodge in and out of people and make a hasty get away one would imagine. The Loreal story is totes funny!
 

Blackrat

War Hero
Moderator
Book Reviewer
#15
i gave the bag snatcher 2 choices 1. phone up the police or 2. receive a kicking, he choice the 2nd option.
Of course he did.

I'll now give you a choice;

1. Stop being such an idiot and crayoning everywhere and you can stay on this site
2. Get banned

Like they always do.
You're quite right. Immigrants are responsible for all foul crimes. You are clearly fucking mental.
 
#16
I actually thought he was referring to the French who are probably even worse than immigrants as they're French. Apart from dark immigrants that is. And French ones, they must be the worst.
 

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