Brilliant Scam going on at work

Discussion in 'The Quarterdeck' started by Ja5on, Sep 30, 2009.

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  1. Basically we have had birds trapped in the roof at work in the past and all the girlies are scared of birds at work. So what me and my mate have done is found soundbites on the internet of seagulls and set of a noise every now and then. We have actually convinced the whole office that there is a seagull trapped in the roof and all the girls are petrified as I keep reminding them of how big they are and how long their beaks are ha ha. I can't believe we have got away with this it's brilliant. :twisted:

    Anyone else done any similar scams
  2. I have an apprentice who thinks sandpaper comes out of his wages. Much the same as the old bunk light bills. He makes every piece of sandpaper last as long as possible and has even been seen fishing pieces out of the bin. The other day he had a proper flash because one of the other lads nicked a piece from his bench.

    He has worked here for over a year.
  3. Yes me being so cleaver had a great scam working at Whale Island. The RN soon cured me.
    I was pay office runner, made the tea, swept the floor, fetched the Wrens stand easy trough so they would not have to put the money back in the safe. Yes the Navy had real money in those days, doubloons or something.
    Cheese cobs at top Naafi were 7d, in old money, about 3p in today's.

    Yes but see down the parade ground they sold them for 4d, a saving of 3d. Now there were around 15 staff in the office, each had at least two cobs so on a bad day I made 30d or 12 and 1/2 new pence. A pint was 10p so in a week I could make about 6 pints minimum, see where I'm going with this?

    Out the office straight down to the rear of drill shed south, which sent you over the car park at the end of the parade ground, which was sectioned off with diamond link chain.
    Except one day as I zoom across,.........STAND STILL!!
    OMG, chain link gone, parade ground extended, and me ambling across in bent cap and faded No 8's straight back from Terror barracks.
    Chief of parade...."Do you believe in space travel"
    Moi....................."Yes chief"
    Chief of parade...."Well orbit around the parade ground until I authorise re entry"
    After dinner got back to pay office, A F P O D, seven days nines,............
    Scams????......Yeah shove em. :evil: :cry:
  4. RumRat
    I had a similar experience back in 1980 when I was an Apprentice Telecoms Engineer with GEC Telecoms.

    We had a Cleaner in the Telephone Exchange that we were installing at the time (Glasgow) His job was to make the Tea and take orders for Scoff which was usually Roll and Sausage. We all thought he was going out and buying these said Items cooked thus charging us full price - At the time - 35p. However the Whiley old git was BUYING the rolls and Sausage and cooking up the stuff himself - saving 20p / roll.

    He was making upward of 70 of these over the day so he was skinning upwards of £14/day or £70/week which was my pay at the time.

    Suffice to say no one clocked it untill he casually drove in three months later with a T reg Toyota Celica - the best of gear. and the Clark of works commenting that the cooker in the canteen was manky.
  5. After a long night at the poker table in the 70's my brother and I finally emerged at about 7 am to get some breakfast.
    standing talking by a roadworks where, for some unaccountable reason, the workers had left a couple of picks down the hole.
    As we were dressed up along came an Irish guy and asked if there was any chance of a start.
    My brother said "I'll give you a chance but need to see if you are a decent worker first"
    Told him to get in the hole and start with the pick towards the centre of the road.
    Down he went and started furiously chopping away at the tarmac in towards the road centre and we slunk away!
    Got to imagine the foremans face when he turned up.
    Shitty thing to do to someone looking for work and if I thought he wouldn't have took my head off for it I would have bunged him a few quid.
    I remember that night well because at the poker table was Frankie Vaughan the singer.
    He called a player next to me a cheat for going for an impossible draw and succeeding,player then did him some hard grievous and left poor Frankie wondering how he was going to be able to sing "Green Door" that night!
    He was a typical show biz ********.
  6. Sea Harrier detat on board

    On board for one week we brought with us our very own steward to contribute to the wardroom. He showed such interest in the FA2 to the extent that we put him forward for a jolly come the time the end of the detachment. It came at a price that his so called ''any of detat write up'' was gleaming. This lad could not believe his luck.. his life long ambition to go up in a sea harrier!! The ship sailed on and over the course of the trip he had been to see nearly every department with us for current briefs including ' will's and emergency procedures in case of the worse!

    The harrier being a one seater jet, none of us really knew why he was so up for this trip, surely a one week samco wouldnt entitle you to fly one! He had it in his head that the ''baggage pod'' strapped to the belly of the harrier was a compartment you could view from!!! He thought he was going in there for his trip in the sky's! Not only has it not got a viewing panel it could just about fit wee man's younger brother in!

    Come the day of the races this young trooper dressed like ''goose'' had his dreams shattered by the squadron when he realised that not only he couldnt fit in the baggage pod, there was no viewing panel! I'd like to say this was done infront of the entire flight but we didnt want him man over board! To his credit he took the joke very well and gained buk sheet time off on return.

    Apparently rumour has it that the new jfh comes with its very own ice pool for pilots taking a break whilst flying on afgan!!

    Up the stewards!
  7. How is that a scam?
  8. sgtpepperband

    sgtpepperband War Hero Moderator Book Reviewer

    Exactly, Guzzler:

    Scam = A confidence trick or confidence game (also known as a bunko, con, flim flam, gaffle, grift, hustle, scheme, or swindle) is an attempt to defraud a person or group by gaining their confidence.

    Can see no benefit to the 'scammer' - other than bullying innocent women... :roll:
  9. Come on Sgtp, how are you sure that these women are innocent :oops:
  10. A slip of the tongue on Sgt Pees part, No-one is innocent everyone is guilty until proven otherwise

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