Bear Grylls will be the new Chief Scout of the UK Scout Association. The famous adventurer takes over when current Chief Scout, former Blue Peter presenter Peter Duncan, completes his five year tenure in July. Bear Grylls takes over from Peter Duncan? Now this Swap Draft could prove interesting for all them they woggle-wearing Boy Scouts. They have all got badges proving that they are now fully proficient in making models of Thunderbird Island out of Bin-liners, used condoms, wet cardboard and sticky-back plastic - I wonder if "Chief Bear" is contemplating introducing a few more badges your kiddies can be the proud winners of? The *Brecon Beacons 100 Kilometre Speed March Badge*. "Right!..........strip down to your Bob the Builder underpants and jump out of the back of the f***ing lorry.....you've got an hour to get back to the Scout Hut you miserable showers of sh*t!!.... it's only 99 clicks and the temperature is still a degree or two above freezing.......!!!" "But, sir.......I'm only eleven....." "ELEVEN???!!!.....F***ING E-L-E-V-E-N ?????!!!!! I WAS HANGING UPSIDE DOWN OUTSIDE THE WINDOWS OF THE IRANIAN EMBASSY WHEN I WAS ELEVEN BOY.....NOW FU**ING JUMP!!" (I've already got my Grandkids on the waiting list for Bravo Two Zero Troop - Plymouth, and this weekend, I'm teaching 'em how to wade neck deep through a ditch full of rotting animal entrails and excrement, so that they can get their hands on the "Bear Grylls Beasting Proficiency Badge - Level 1). So the next time a little kid, clad all in black, wearing a respirator and carrying a varied assortment of firearms, knocks on your door.......... you'd better give him a job, otherwise he's liable to take out all your double glazing with shaped charges. Click!