War Hero
Q: Did you hear about the dyslexic Satanist?
A: He sold his soul to Santa
Q: Did you hear about the guy that lost his left arm and leg in a car crash?
A: He's all right now.

Q: How do crazy people go through the forest?
A: They take the psycho path.

Q: How do you get holy water?
A: Boil the hell out of it.

Q: How does a spoiled rich girl change a light bulb?
A: She says, "Daddy, I want a new apartment.

Q: What did the fish say when he hit a concrete wall?
A: Dam.

Q: What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long?
A: Polaroids.

Q: What do prisoners use to call each other?
A: Cell phones.

Q: What do the letters D.N.A. stand for?
A: National Dyslexics Association.

Q: What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work?
A: A stick.

Q: What do you call cheese that isn't yours?
A: Nacho Cheese.

Q: What do you call Santa's helpers?
A: Subordinate Clauses.

Q: What do you call four bull fighters in quicksand?
A: Quatro sinko.

Q: What do you get from a pampered cow?
A: Spoiled milk.

Q: What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
A: Frostbite.

Q: What do you get when you cross an elephant and a skin doctor?
A: A pachydermatologist
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