Best pissed off/ threaders line

Discussion in 'Diamond Lil's' started by stan_the_man, Dec 11, 2010.

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  1. Got to be either:
    Fcuk my tall hat
    Well my cocks a kipper
     
  2. You`ve obviously mistaken me for someone who gives a shit.

    Do I look like I give a shit?

    Or the one my Grandad used, tame, "Well, I`ll go to the foot of our stairs!" :?
     
  3. Take your head for a sh1t and wipe your mouth.
     
  4. whoopyfuckingdoo
     
  5. 'Hang on, I've got something for you...' *reaches into pocket and produces 2 x fingers*

    or, heard years ago from a scouser...

    'Hope yer balls turn to oxo cubes; an all yer kids are beef!'
     
  6. wet_blobby

    wet_blobby War Hero Moderator

    Here's 20p go phone someone who gives a fcuk.
     
  7. Now I know why I miss the Navy so much.

    No.

    Really.

    I do.
     
  8. looking for sympathy?

    you can find it in the dictionary between shit and syphillis
     
  9. Hope your Earholes turn to arseholes & shit all over your shoulders.
     
  10. I didn't ask for your life story

    Do what the f8ck you like, you always do
     
  11. You're few fries short of a happy meal
     
  12. Ten degrees short of an "All Round Look"
     
  13. May you never shit thicker than black thread.
     
  14. harry thread bats
     
  15. im putting my notice in safeguard
     
  16. Get a big black dog up yer
    Have a shit and sit in it.
    And.....
    jog on
     
  17. Ex-matelot part timing in an Orange call centre was getting a hard
    time off the female supervisor (he'd brought a flask of coffee in for
    himself).
    She was going off on one, spouting H&S, scalding, spilling on keyboards
    and other mundane bollocks when he decided enough was enough and
    sort of stopped her dead with the nice matloesque put-down:

    "Oh for f**ks sake.....STOW YOUR TITS WOMAN AND GO AND TAKE YOUR FACE FOR A SHIT!"

    Shift was one short that evening.
     
  18. Dont know why its so annoying but saying to someone "cheers dits" normally does the trick
     
  19. Suck my plums

    Who lit your tampon string?
     

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