BBC Flashes up the Outrage Bus

Discussion in 'Current Affairs' started by trelawney126, Oct 23, 2012.

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  1. janner

    janner War Hero Book Reviewer

    BBC will now be using anything to draw attention away from the Savile disgrace, in the same way that Pollies try to hide their grasping behaviour
  2. What else can you do to move a person along once you have finished impersonating Sgt Wilson 'would you mind awfully to move along please'
  3. Hope they managed to deport a few, unfortunately they seem to get rid of those that are willing to graft for a living, and the illegal criminal element surprisingly disappear when let out on bail pending further investigations? But we are but a small Island and us on pensions pay enough tax already.

    I suppose the Beeb can not investigate Saville, if parts of the Beeb are under investigation? Just a thought, they should have done it when they had the chance.
  4. Fuckin hell Sumo this is a contraversial post for RR.
    I think we should have given them a big house, a BMW, and a regular supply of grocery.
    Oh and cash.
  5. You trying to get your relatives over from Ozz, or are you speaking about someone you know?
  6. They should have deported the rest of the family and left her in the detention centre.
    After a week or two on her own she would soon change her mind
  7. Don't give him ideas Sumo ... next thing there will be a boat load of Abo's in pikey vans setting up home in the central reservation of Sphagetti Junction claiming its a sacred site! ... Oh hang about ... one of them did that in 2000!
  8. Quite right and there's **** all you English can do.
    It ain't your country anymore it belongs to us immigrants, the EU rules Britannia and the sooner you understand that the easier the transition.
    The English are a joke, they give aid to countries that are financially better off than themselves, and the government says jump the population shouts "How high".
    If Scotland says good bye you will shout how much money do you want and then give it them.
    And the population of England will mutter, mumble, and then roll over, whilst the rest of the world snigger's and thinks "*****".
    In foreign of course.
  9. The latest poll taken by the UK yielded results on whether or not people who live in UK think illegal immigration is a serious problem: a) 39% of the respondents answered: "Yes, it is a serious problem." b) 61% of the respondents answered: "To nie stanowi powaznego problemu."

    Coming soon to the BBC Immigrant Channel, these great new shows:

    Currynation Street, Islamadale, Pakarama, Middle East enders, Britains got Talibans, Mock the Sikh, You've been Bombed, The Wheel of Misfortune, Postman Raj, Black Peter and for our Israeli chums - Scooby Jew.

    I've got a new Immigrant neighbour. His wife stays in the house all day, cooking and cleaning, and does exactly what he tells her to do. He comes home from his on-the-side, part-time job, then beats her and occasionally rapes her. His house is all paid for by the government and he gets over £300 a week in benefits. It makes me ******* sick.

    Bloody foreigners. Coming over here, living the dream.

    and Finally!

    Australia is a very confusing place, taking up a large amount of the bottom half of the planet. It is recognisable from orbit because of many unusual features, including what at first looks like an enormous bite taken out of its southern edge; a wall of sheer cliffs which plunge deep into the girting sea. Geologists assure us that this is simply an accident of geomorphology and plate tectonics, but they still call it the "Great Australian Bight" proving that not only are they covering up a more frightening theory, but they can't spell either.
    The first of the confusing things about Australia is the status of the place. Where other land masses and sovereign lands are classified as either continent, island or country, Australia is considered all three. Typically, it is unique in this.
    The second confusing thing about Australia are the animals. They can be divided into three categories: Poisonous, Odd, and Sheep. It is true that of the 10 most poisonous arachnids on the planet, Australia has 9 of them. Actually, it would be more accurate to say that of the 9 most poisonous arachnids, Australia has all of them. However, there are curiously few snakes, possibly because the spiders have killed them all.
    But even the spiders won't go near the sea. Any visitors should be careful to check inside boots (before putting them on) under toilet seats (before sitting down) and generally everywhere else. A stick is very useful for this task.
    Strangely, it tends to be the second class of animals (the Odd) that are more dangerous. The creature that kills the most people each year is the common Wombat. It is nearly as ridiculous as its name, and spends its life digging holes in the ground, in which it hides. During the night it comes out to eat worms and grubs.
    The wombat kills people in two ways: First, the animal is indestructible. Digging holes in the hard Australian clay builds muscles that outclass Olympic weightlifters. At night, they often wander the roads. Semi-trailers (Road Trains) have hit them at high speed, with all 9 wheels on one side, and this merely makes them very annoyed. They express this by snorting, glaring, and walking away. Alas, to smaller cars, the wombat becomes an asymmetrical high-speed launching pad, with results that can be imagined, but not adequately described.
    The second way the wombat kills people relates to its burrowing behaviour. If a person happens to put their hand down a Wombat hole, the Wombat will feel the disturbance and think "Ho! My hole is collapsing!" at which it will brace its muscled legs and push up against the roof of its burrow with incredible force, to prevent its collapse. Any unfortunate hand will be crushed, and attempts to withdraw will cause the Wombat to simply bear down harder. The unfortunate will then bleed to death through their crushed hand as the wombat prevents him from seeking assistance. This is considered the third most embarrassing known way to die, and Australians don't talk about it much.
    At this point, we would like to mention the Platypus, estranged relative of the mammal, which has a duck-bill, otter's tail, webbed feet, lays eggs, detects its aquatic prey in the same way as the electric eel, and has venomous barbs attached to its hind legs, thus combining all 'typical' Australian attributes into a single improbable creature.
    The last confusing thing about Australia is the inhabitants. First, a short history: Some time around 40,000 years ago, some people arrived in boats from the north. They ate all the available food, and lot of them died. The ones that survived learned respect for the balance of nature,> man's proper place in the scheme of things, and spiders. They settled in,and spent a lot of the intervening time making up strange stories.
    Then, around 200 years ago, Europeans arrived in boats from the north. More accurately, European convicts were sent, with a few deranged and stupid people in charge. They tried to plant their crops in Autumn (failing to take account of the reversal of the seasons when moving from the top half of the planet to the bottom), ate all their food, and a lot of them died. About then the sheep arrived, and have been treasured ever since.
    It is interesting to note here that the Europeans always consider themselves vastly superior to any other race they encounter, since they can lie, cheat, steal, and litigate (marks of a civilised culture, they say) - whereas all the Aboriginals can do is happily survive being left in the middle of a vast red-hot desert, equipped with a stick.
    Eventually, the new lot of people stopped being Europeans on Extended Holiday and became Australians. The changes are subtle, but deep, caused by the mind-stretching expanses of nothingness and eerie quiet, where a person can sit perfectly still and look deep inside themselves to the core of their essence, their reasons for being, and the necessity of checking inside your boots every morning for fatal surprises. They also picked up the most finely tuned sense of irony in the world, and the Aboriginal gift for making up stories. Be warned.
    There is also the matter of the beaches. Australian beaches are simply the nicest and best in the entire world. Although anyone actually venturing into the sea will have to contend with sharks, stinging jellyfish, stonefish (a fish which sits on the bottom of the sea, pretends to be a rock, and has venomous barbs sticking out of its back that will kill just from the pain) and surfboarders. However, watching a beach sunset is worth the risk.
    As a result of all this hardship, dirt, thirst, and wombats, you would expect Australians to be a dour lot. Instead, they are genial, jolly, cheerful, and always willing to share a kind word with a stranger, unless they are an American. Faced with insurmountable odds and impossible problems, they smile disarmingly and look for a stick. Major engineering feats have been performed with sheets of corrugated iron, string, and mud.
    Alone of all the races on earth, they seem to be free from the 'Grass is Greener on the other side of the fence' syndrome, and roundly proclaim that Australia is, in fact, the other side of that fence. They call the land "Oz", "Godzone" (a verbal contraction of "God's Own Country") and "Best bloody place on earth, bar none, strewth." The irritating thing about this is they may be right.
    There are some traps for the unsuspecting traveller, though. Do not under any circumstances suggest that the beer is imperfect, unless you are comparing it to another kind of Australian beer. Do not wear a Hawaiian shirt. Religion and Politics are safe topics of conversation (Australians don't care too much about either) but Sport is a minefield. The only correct answer to "So, how d'ya like our country, eh?" is "Best {insert your own regional swear word here} country in the world!".
    It is very likely that, on arriving, some cheerful Australians will 'adopt' you, and on your first night, and take you to a pub where Australian Beer is served. Despite the obvious danger, do not refuse. It is a form of initiation rite. You will wake up late the next day with an astonishing hangover, a foul-taste in your mouth, and wearing strange clothes. Your hosts will usually make sure you get home, and waive off any legal difficulties with "It's his first time in Australia, so we took him to the pub.", to which the policeman will> sagely nod and close his notebook. Be sure to tell the story of these events to every other Australian you encounter, adding new embellishments at every stage, and noting how strong the beer was. Thus you will be accepted into this unique culture.
    Most Australians are now urban dwellers, having discovered the primary use of electricity, which is air-conditioning and refrigerators.
    Typical Australian sayings
    "It's better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick."
    "She'll be right."
    "And down from Kosioskco, where the pine clad ridges raise their torn and rugged battlements on high, where the air is clear is crystal, and the white stars fairly blaze at midnight in the cold and frosty sky. And where, around the overflow, the reed beds sweep and sway to the breezes, and the rolling plains are wide. The Man from Snowy River is a household word today, and the stockmen tell the story of his ride."
    Tips to Surviving Australia
    Don't ever put your hand down a hole for any reason whatsoever. We mean it.
    The beer is stronger than you think, regardless of how strong you think it is.
    Always carry a stick.
    Do not attempt to use Australian slang, unless you are a trained linguist and good in a fistfight.
    Thick socks.
    Take good maps. Stopping to ask directions only works when there are people nearby.
    If you leave the urban areas, carry several litres of water with you at all times, or you will die.
    Even in the most embellished stories told by Australians, there is always a core of truth that it is unwise to ignore. See Also: "Deserts: How to die in them", "The Stick: Second most useful thing ever" and "Poisonous and Venomous arachnids, insects, animals, trees, shrubs, fish and sheep of Australia, volumes 1-42"
    • Like Like x 3
  10. I'm surprised that people are only now cottoning on to the fact the BBC are corrupt biased *****. Scratch that, no I'm not.
  11. The only reason the Beeb exists is as the mouthpiece for HMG (along with "The Torygraph") and as such is really just another HMG department. The fact that we (the public) have to fund the Beeb by the purchase of a licence even if you never watch that damn repeats and rubbish they put out really p*sses me off.

    I do not feel that the Beeb should investigate JS ... it should be an external enquiry and the Beeb should be made to co-operate with the investigation and give the investigators full access to any evidence that JS was a paedo without hinderance!

    Any internal investigation into JS by the Beeb will only end up in lies and cover-ups.
  12. Last edited: Oct 23, 2012
  13. All good except the checking of shoes every morning.
    Just don't wash your feet, the little bastards hate it.
  14. I object to the BBC tax, (licence fee) It being compulsory if you own a television, when there are thousands (well, a lot) of channels, terrestial or otherwise which I could watch. As Jeremy Paxman famously said.....'If I buy a washing machine, I shouldn't have to pay a tax to Persil' :protest:
  15. ==============================


    As the only broadcaster 'back in the day' Lord Reith's TORs for BBC was to set very high tones and standards of broadcasting content. These arguably 'homogenised' GB's values as how our nation saw itself ATT (esp. during WW2) and indeed continued for a long while afterwards.

    IIRC Reith was a complex and autocratic character but 'Auntie' drifted astray as his legacy faded and commercial Radio & TV emerged and developed as powerul alternatives.
  16. Only an optomist would believe there is any evidence lurking in the BBC archives which suggest the hierarchy there were aware of JS's little proclavities.It will have been deleted or destroyed by now as the BBC's senior managemnt try to cover their arses.At best long dead personnel will end up getting the blame with the living being shown up as little more than naive or ill informed.I was down at B&Q today and there was big BBC logoed van loading big cans of whitewash.It looks as though someone is going to be busy.
    Anyone who watched their head honcho's shifty evasive performance in front of the MPs will get some idea about what to expect in the future inquiries.
  17. So we hang the grandson for the crimes of the grandad.
    Seems fair.
    Also I noticed that as soon as it was suggested that there might be someone to sue for compensation, the victims poured out the woodwork.
    He becomes a homosexual quicker than concord, and the day after he is a necrophiliac.
    If animals could sue he'd have been around whipsnade with Viagra.
    That the dirty bugger did get off with young uns is true, but it amazes me at the statements of some of them.
    "The second time he raped me was the third time I went for a car ride with him, we thought it was class being seen with celebrities".
    At best now we call them groupies, but the other name maybe sluts. Oh sorry they were underage so they were in need of protection. Well why were they out at all hours getting their hoops stretched if so young and vulnerable.
    It detracts from the genuine cases that did get abused.

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