Awful jokes

Ballistic

War Hero
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LifebuoyGhost

Lantern Swinger
Two germs walking on the railway line. Suddenly it starts to vibrate and they look up to see the express train bearing down at a rate of knots.
”Oh sh1t says one germ to the other, we’re a gonner ‘ere”
 

Topstop

War Hero
A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband. Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen. "Careful," he said, "CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my GOD! You're cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW! We need more butter. Oh my GOD! WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER? They're going to STICK! Careful CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when you're cooking! Never! Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind? Don't forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them. Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!" The wife stared at him. "What in the world is wrong with you? You think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?" The husband calmly replied, "I just wanted to show you what it feels like when I'm driving."
 

UtagawaAki

Midshipman
I hate that this is a thing LOL. I have a soft spot for dad jokes and this thread is filled with them lol. I was aware of the mainstream dad jokes but the ones listed on here have been great entertainment. I know that there are people who are opposed to it but you know that humour is subjective and needs to be taken in the right way. There are some people who hate making jokes and I don't know why. Hopefully, there are proper people who can take a joke in the coming months especially with how the people absorb jokes. I hope people can lighten up sometimes man lol
 

Sumo

War Hero
I hate that this is a thing LOL. I have a soft spot for dad jokes and this thread is filled with them lol. I was aware of the mainstream dad jokes but the ones listed on here have been great entertainment. I know that there are people who are opposed to it but you know that humour is subjective and needs to be taken in the right way. There are some people who hate making jokes and I don't know why. Hopefully, there are proper people who can take a joke in the coming months especially with how the people absorb jokes. I hope people can lighten up sometimes man lol
not funny?
 

taffscrivs

War Hero
Tell you what is awful, all this modern speak abbreviations shite. Same goes for so called 'alternative comedians'.
The alternative to funny is not funny= awful.
 

taffscrivs

War Hero
The world's rarest pocupine is the Four Prong, so called because the males have four little pointed prongs on the end of their penis. They are extremely rare as their penis is the favourite food of a large black cat which gave it's name to a famous motor car, the Four Point Two Litre Jaguar.....
 

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