Ask the Grandads...............Unbiased advice from RRs Old Men

We old bgrs have lived the life and know ALL
So any young thrusters out there needing advice on anything at all feel free to ask.
One of our wizened old bstrds is waiting to help.
If you need to know which iron to steal from bright homes or how to turn down a brown hatters advances then we are here for you.
Advice is FREE and often will be fkn offfensive, however if you cannot take a joke you should not be considering a life with The Grey Funnel line


War Hero
Book Reviewer
My lips are sore and dry. What do you recommended to get them wet and less sensitive?

Just the thoughts of a blonde ex-wren. Don't blame me if it all goes tits up.
Sorry J_F_H, but, there is some order to your link, so it cannot possible show the workings of the female mind

Slim, its not that I care, its just that I wondered, and as you said you know ALL, I thought I would ask
Perhaps we need a grandma on site to answer that one:oops:

Art the Fart

To whet ones lips.
What's your favourite part of a man?
You've forgotten!--
But you had it on the tip of your tongue.
Bullying in the Royal Navy as a method of training.

Which is better? If a rating gets something wrong when he/she is on their first ship should the LHOM:

(a). Make gentle suggestions as to how to correct their mistakes?
(b). Send them a text or post the correct way of doing something on their Facebook page?
(c). Offer them a bit of encouragement by twatting the rating upside the head with a copy of "Flags of all Nations" or some other hefty publication that is readily available?
(d). Attach said rating to the 6" shell hoist (naked), with several rolls of masking tape - seeing as it happened to run up through 3E Mess, and leave him there overnight until he came to terms with the mistake(s) he made?

Hasn't had any long lasting detrimental effects on me.....we didn't have mobiles OR the internet back then.
hey granddad, If you know it all, then answer me this one

Women! how the hell does their mind work?
The issue with a female brain is simple, when in design the brain was removed for essential design changes (ability to save money, hate shopping, never nag etc.), unfortunately it was a Friday afternoon when doing the rebuild, so the boss man managed to fit it back in upside down and back to front, this error was missed until it was too late to rectify, so to this day no one has a fucking clue how they work, they just function at random.

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