Are U Bored

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous' started by The_Caretaker, Jan 5, 2011.

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  1. Why can't blondes count to 70?


    Because 69 is a bit of a mouthful

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    Why do blondes have legs?


    So they don't get stuck to the ground.
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    What's the Blonde's cheer?


    "I'm blonde, I'm blonde, I'm B.L.O.N....ah, oh well..
    I'm blonde, I'm blonde, yea yea yea..."
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    Why did the blonde take a ruler to bed?

    She wanted to see how long she slept
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    Did you hear about the girl who was so blonde that at the bottom of her job application where it says "Sign Here" she put "Scorpio"?

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    Did you hear about the girl who was so blonde that she thought "Boyz II Men" was a daycare center.

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    Did you hear about the girl who was so blonde that she thought "Hamburger Helper" came with another person.

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    Did you hear about the girl who was so blonde that she thought she needed a token to get on Soul Train.

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    Did you hear about the blonde that sold her car for gas money?

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    One day a highway officer pulls over a blonde on the freeway because she has had her blinker on for some time now. He puts the siren on and they pull over. He gets out of the patrol car and says, "Miss, did you know that your blinker is on?"

    She says, "But officer, no it isn't! Ummmm....ooh, yes, it is! um, uh, no, it isn't.... umm yes, it is!"

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    A blonde woman competed with a brunette and a redhead in the Breast Stroke division of an English Channel swim competition. The brunette came in first and the redhead was a close second. Much later, the blonde finally reached shore, completely exhausted. After being revived with blankets and coffee, she muttered "I don't want to sound like a sore loser, but I think those other two girls used their arms."

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    Two blondes were driving through Louisiana. As they were approaching Natchitoches, they started arguing about the pronunciation of the town. They argued back and forth until they stopped for lunch. As they stood at the counter, one blonde asked the manager, "Before we order, could you please settle an argument for us? Would you please pronounce where we are,...very slowly?"

    The manager leaned over the counter and said, "Burrrrrrrr-gerrrrrrr Kiiiiing."
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    What did the blonde yell when she witnessed an accident?

    "What's the number for 911?"
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    Why don't blondes make Jell-o?


    They can't figure out how to get two cups of water into those little packages.
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    Why don't blondes eat pickles?


    Because they can't get their head in the jar
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    What's the first thing a blonde does in the morning?

    Introduces herself.
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    What is the worst thing about sex with a blonde?


    Bucket seats.
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    What important question does a blonde ask her partner before having sex?


    Do you want this by the hour, or the flat rate?

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    If a blonde and a brunette are tossed off a building, who hits the ground first?


    The brunette. The blonde has to stop to ask for directions.
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    What's the difference between a blonde and a Porsche?


    You don't lend the Porsche out to your friend.
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