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  1. An old mate of mine needs a Chef, top bloke and I have some real dirt on him :)


    Chef required for restaurant in Norway.
    2 month contract. Starting ASAP.
    Good salary, flights arranged, food & accommodation provided.
    Please email cv to [email protected]
    Must be EU or UK based and available to leave ASAP.
    Last edited: Aug 11, 2016
  2. witsend

    witsend War Hero Book Reviewer

    I'm petty much perfect for the position except my chef training consisted of 4 months on a YTS.

    Here's my CV,

    witsend is a the dogs bollocks, just don't engage in any conversation before 9am. Will work for sexual favours and cash in hand.

    Boiling pasta - Check
    Cheesy Hammy - I was in the ******* navy, I could shit one out.
    Cereal - Not a spot of milk spilled.
    Duff - Expert skills!
    Fish - Stinks, won't touch it!
    Personal hygiene - Under review.
    Chips - Balanced, one on each shoulder.
    Last edited: Aug 10, 2016
    • Like Like x 1
  3. Not forgetting:
    Chips - one carried on each shoulder. ;)
    • Like Like x 1
  4. witsend

    witsend War Hero Book Reviewer

    CV updated.
    • Like Like x 3
    • Funny Funny x 1

  5. EGY, OK - but is the other one Cheesy Hammy?

    • Like Like x 1
  6. Did you know that cheesy hammy eggy spoken in Norwegian is cheesy hammy eggy.
    • Informative Informative x 3
  7. ...Fromagey, jamboney, cackleberry, in French. :)
    • Informative Informative x 1

  8. Apologies, Billy, I thought you were bullshitting. But when I tried a translation thingy on the web it showed you were absolutely correct.

    Mind you, many other languages translate cheesy hammy eggy as cheesy hammy eggy, too.

    Hebrew doesn't, though. It translates cheesy hammy eggy as לאה פז גזית חלקלק. פרנץ.
    Best be a bit subtle about using it, though, as it's not strictly kosher. You could be about as popular as a
    צלעות חזיר בחתונה

    With no apple sauce.
  9. Cheesy, hammy ,eggy,topside, to be precise, thats a fried egg on top of cheese ,I thank those flying types have grated cheese on top of fried/poached egg. And the norwegian for a gang bang is a cluster ****.

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