Alternative to sex

Discussion in 'Diamond Lil's' started by rod-gearing, Feb 8, 2010.

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  1. What takes your mind off it if it's not forth coming from the other half?
    I find sorting out my sock draw and pairing all my socks in the right order helps,sad I know but it works.

    Apart from the usual way are there any other alternatives?

    Hopefully yours
    Frustrated of Stoke
  2. Internet porn and copius amounts of alcohol
  3. Unfortunately I have the opposite problem. Mrs 2_Deck is going through that newly married, 'I want a sprog' phase.

    The minute I walk through the door after work she pretty much rapes me.

    This leaves me absolutely no time to sort out the important things in my life, like arranging my socks by colour or spending time in my shed going through my tools.

    Try masturbating furiously, I find that helps.
  4. Wanking a lot always used to work for me.
  5. Gardening?
  6. Good idea, this opens up loads of opportunities to spend some time in the shed. :D
  7. Only a female could come up with that alternative. :lol:
  8. Try a nice bit of DIY. If you can't find anything to do then break something and you will then have to take a trip to a man shop to look at tools to fix the problem.

    Great excuse to do manley things. :D

    Alternative, as an Endoner, nip to The Plough for a nice beer or two....ooops sorry pimms :wink: .
  9. janner

    janner War Hero Book Reviewer

    Sol. You aren't to good at this are you? :wink:

  10. The 'Eden' complex??
  11. Just get proper lashed smash up your local and kill a few whores that should leave you with enough on your mind to not think about sex for at least a minute.
  12. It's pronounced 'Dogging'.
  13. sgtpepperband

    sgtpepperband War Hero Moderator Book Reviewer

  14. There's only one alternative to sex:

  15. sgtpepperband

    sgtpepperband War Hero Moderator Book Reviewer

  16. Get married get caught shagging your therapist, make up shag like bunnies for a couple of years then look for a new therapist preferably female
  17. MMMMMMM Sex cant remember what it is like its been that long. But to take your mind off thinking about just Susan Boyle. :D :D :D

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