Alternative Olympic Games

Discussion in 'Diamond Lil's' started by MG Maniac, Jul 31, 2012.

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  1. OK .. following on from Billy's idea about alternative Games which Jonny Foreigner hasn't the hope of winning ... what other ideas are there???

    I just want to know which matelot / Royal is going for gold in the "shag as many athletes as you can" in the counterpain hurdling event?

    Team event! At least 5 from the same ship getting all nighters with the Swedish beach Volley Ball Team.

    Individual competions for

    2's up!

    The most athletes shagged.

    The most different nationalities shagged.

    (One for Royal) - Shag (of any nationality) and leave wearing her national dress / uniform!

    The most innovative place for a shag within the Olympic Complex
  2. Uckers, Deck hockey (middi ship rules), Crockadilypig trapping, running (and climbing) down the centre of the ship,. mast manning, cutlass drill, Swedish longball (is is played anywhere other than Raleigh), Beer can shooting (marlin spike version).
  3. Pissed jack 800m running away from reggies relay race, I once got the golden blanket award on a patrol, maybe golden blanket could team up with egyptian PT?
  4. I'd like to be number two on the clutterfcuk team
  5. Chit Chat/Bombay runner/Bootlace Snake eating.
  6. (granny)

    (granny) Book Reviewer

    seriously...a heaving line chucking competition !!
  7. (granny)

    (granny) Book Reviewer

    No lead weights in the monkeys fist allowed.
  8. Presumably with a dockyard matey to aim at????????????????
  9. Ageing_Gracefully

    Ageing_Gracefully War Hero Moderator Book Reviewer

    Allowing illegal immigrants into the country. We would pish that competition.
  10. The Mens 10 x 100 metre dit-spinning relay. Gun goes off....BANG! First runner thinks of a dit. Runs like fu*k to the next runner in his team and hands over his dit to him, and then he legs it, and so on and so forth. The winner is the team whose dit at the end of the race sounds absolutely fu*k all like the first bit of the dit that the first team runner thought of, when he started to spin his dit, as he legged it down the track.
    Last edited: Jul 31, 2012
  11. Already been thought of as the game of Chinese Whispers.I expect the Chinks already have a team trained up and ready to win the gold medal should it be suggested for the Limpix.
  12. ==========================


    :idea: Cheesy-Hammy-Eggy and Spoon race.
    • Like Like x 1
  13. The Travellers Marathon. A 26 mile road race using uninsured Ford Transits with no tax or MOT and a 2nd hand caravan. Teams have to race along roads, heading towards a field behind a disused MFI Warehouse where they have to set up camp and turn it into a shit-tip in under three hours. The winners will definitely be a team that speak some sort of vague English-type it sort of counts.
  14. The run ashore triathalon.
    You are up top in a blue suit, when you hear finished with main engines, you have to get down to the grot and change into civvies, extra points can be awarded if you have a RA bath and dhobi before putting on the civvies, pack a grip with 2 weeks crabby gear and get back up on to the jetty, flag down a fast black and direct him to the Star of Bombay, where you have to scoff down a Vindaloo, two Banana fritters and 6 pints of lager, points can be awarded if Naans are ordered with the meal, points will be lost if at any time during the meal you call any member of staff “John”, retrospective points can be awarded if you do not follow through before turn to the next day.
  15. What about alternative commentators, listen out for moves such as "flat bag" "crazy days" "battered sav" and "hello boys"

    Last edited: Jul 31, 2012
  16. sgtpepperband

    sgtpepperband War Hero Moderator Book Reviewer

    I'd pay good money to see Finks in the 400m back pedal Final... :twisted:
    • Like Like x 1
  17. sgtpepperband

    sgtpepperband War Hero Moderator Book Reviewer

    Yeahhh! Kermit wins the 200m butterfly final:

  18. At first glance I thought he was fisting Miss Piggy as well.
  19. sgtpepperband

    sgtpepperband War Hero Moderator Book Reviewer

    Speaking of which, has JD been back to update us on what her heroic brother is up to these days..?
    • Like Like x 1
  20. ...naw, I suppose he's still in training.

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