Alright... How do people get off, in the RN?

AB111

Badgeman
Do you just bag the nearest female after drills are done and then drill her consensually or is it such that all sailors, male and female, wait to come ashore and find the nearest hotel/pub to spend their yearly allowance of sexual opportunities? I assume there's separate shower cubicles in the RN too, so as to not encourage too much buggering either. Not complaining if there isn't, as one has gotta make do with what's at hand, that's the RN ethos isn't it.

Pretty crucial to know before going in.

Survival of the species, you understand.

Oh and no need to mention the manual labour known as masturbation, because that's a given. Although I doubt ther's much time in a 6 on, 6 off schedule, but that's why I'm asking the experts, a bunch of w*ers like you lot. (Ninja being the exception. He's nice)

There's been a couple of high profile cases recently of fraternization which led to dismissals, so I wondered. Can't go in and hope they're all ugly now can I. And no, Sonar Bender, I don't expect my own personal harem, although if it's a no-picture area then might reconsider innit.

Thanks for helping me understand the joining process better and how life in the RN really is. They never cover this subject.
 

skyvet

GCM
You sound just like the sort of recruit the Crabfats are after, so maybe you should leave the Senior Service to the grown-ups and join them!

(Have I just bitten?)
 

Spare_Rib

Lantern Swinger
:rolleyes: I reserved judgment on the (somewhat whiney) ‘I don’t want my picture taken’ thread, but this one has made my mind up. I fear there’s soon going to be another ‘someone to avoid in the mess’ name to add to my list.....

Edited to say - can we barge this?
 

SONAR-BENDER

War Hero
He (She?) likes me! Looks like I've trapped! Spooky though - how did he know about my harem?

OK - I thought you were coming across as a bit of a wanker in the photo thread - this one has just confirmed it.

You are either a teenage millenial snowflake trying to play with the older boys (possibly a bit too erudite?) or a pretty crap'investigative' journalist, but most likely some sad wind up merchant like Monty playing a tosser's game after he flounced off.

Why not pop along to the M27 and play with the cars?

Note: Being in the Communty area, if the word wanker gets starred out it was W anchor!
 

AB111

Badgeman
He (She?) likes me! Looks like I've trapped! Spooky though - how did he know about my harem?

OK - I thought you were coming across as a bit of a ****** in the photo thread - this one has just confirmed it.

You are either a teenage millenial snowflake trying to play with the older boys (possibly a bit too erudite?) or a pretty crap'investigative' journalist, but most likely some sad wind up merchant like Monty playing a tosser's game after he flounced off.

Why not pop along to the M27 and play with the cars?

Note: Being in the Communty area, if the word ****** gets starred out it was W anchor!
Yes I do like you. However I don't dare take you out for a moon-lit dinner, as I'm not certain how submariners react to the concept of celestial bodies upon first contact; after all, snowflakes clearly weren't your thing. But thank you for complimenting my age, what a gentleman. In hindsight though, you should be glad if it's a teenager trying to play with an oldie and not an oldie trying to play with a teenager, but then the Merchant Navy did always do things differently.

I do have a confession: I always dreamt of being a crap investigative journalist, but then I found out how poorly the Guardian pays their journalists. Thus if I'm to be paid like crap, I might as well start off at the deep end, at the Daily Mail. At least this way I can practice writing fiction, should I suddenly want to author a history book.

I also suspected the harem was real, due to notes in your signature. Each capital letter of each starting sentence: SWA. This could only be Sex While Aging and aren't submarines rather phallic too? It's all too clear what the consequences of that is. A crypto-haremist has seen the light of day.

FFS - Is this Throbber for real? Or just a real Throbber...:rolleyes:
Something is definitely throbbing. Maybe we can use Sonar Benders Sonar to find it.

Hahaha! I opened the post gingerly thinking, it's not going to be about THAT.
Expectation is a beautiful thing. You should hold the mouse over threads, so you can see what's in them. Shame that this doesn't work with people, but then again mice do have a poor reputation.


At any rate, I thank the generous commenters. Especially the maritime equivalent of bend it like beckam: Sonar Bender. I have broached an important subject. One that many want to know about, but can't ask about. It would be unrealistic to expect that people become priests upon entering the RN.
 
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AB111

Badgeman
You sound just like the sort of recruit the Crabfats are after, so maybe you should leave the Senior Service to the grown-ups and join them!

(Have I just bitten?)
Good point. I do have a propensity to sit down for long periods of time. So RAF, then? Or perhaps Artillery Officer. Leave it to me to inspire the men, when they miss their targets.
 
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SONAR-BENDER

War Hero
Norman. Has to be.

Stormin' Norman.





I quite like having a stalker! It will be such an anti climax (fnar fnar) when he is unmasked.
 

AB111

Badgeman
I note you reported @Ballistic's post @AB111, for rudeness.

Perhaps, I can further assist by asking you awfully nicely to fcuk off, if you wouldn't mind.

Better?
Why of course I did - just like I expect people to report mine, if I am.

Rudeness as I didn't attack him and lack of humour - sadly included by the mods too huh. It's a shame you had to ruin your reputation in such a lowly way, as you normally keep calm and courteous, along with your informational answers, that people admire :). But getting likes from the community is apparently more important lol. I guess my job is done!
 
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