all posts about the scots

Discussion in 'Diamond Lil's' started by docherty, Sep 4, 2009.

Welcome to the Navy Net aka Rum Ration

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial RN website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. :twisted: here is a wee joke about the view of scots on the English.

    3 guys, 1 Irish, 1 English and 1 Scotch, are walking along the beach one day and come across a lantern and a Genie pops out of it.
    "I give you each one wish, that's three wishes in total", says the Genie.
    The Irish guy says, "I am a fisherman, my Dad's a fisherman, his Dad was a fisherman and my son will be one too. I want all the oceans full of fish for all eternity."
    So, with a blink of the Genie's eye "AlKaZoom" the oceans were teaming with fish.
    The English guy was amazed, so he said, "I want a wall around England, protecting her, so that nothing will get in for all eternity.
    Again, with a blink of the Genie's eye "AlkaZoom - POOF" there was a huge wall around England. The Scot asks, "I'm very curious. Please tell me more about this wall.
    The Genie explains, "Well, it's about 150 feet high, 50 feet thick, protecting England so that nothing can get in or out."
    The Scot says, "Ach, fill it up with water." :hello1: :hello1:
  2. Like a Porridge Wog would know what water is...........
  3. Ageing_Gracefully

    Ageing_Gracefully War Hero Moderator Book Reviewer

    Of course we know all about water - after the emount that falls out of the sky on us :( !!!

    However, the challenge seems to be in showing various English 'country' gentlemen what soap is used for. (You can include scousers in this :lol: )
  4. we drink water in a fermented form as it has grater effects on the body including beer goggles that can make the ugliest of jelly ells eating cokney to look half attractive.
  5. Yeah but you still can't spell can you? You sweaty, ginger, crab infested cnut.
  6. Tight Scot cnuts

    Old Sandy was dying. Tenderly, his wife Maggie knelt by his bedside and asked:
    ‘Anything I can get you, Sandy?’
    No reply.
    ‘Have ye no’ a last wish, Sandy?’ Faintly, came the answer. . . ‘a wee bit of yon boiled ham.’
    ‘Wheesht, man,’ said Maggie, ‘ye ken fine that’s for the funeral.’
  7. I trust our cousins, north of the border, will be supporting England's endeavours against johnny foreigner" at Wembley this evening. :)
  8. He probably can, it's just he's adjusted his keyboard settings to "placquey toothed inbed frisp fcukwad."
  9. :D Dont bank on it Gombear,if i know the jockanees they will be praying for johnny foreigner to slaughter England :D
  10. Not at all...some of us Scots quite like the Englishstanis...and ARE Johnny Foreigner!!
  11. I have nothing against the scots people but thats quite true what you say,i did feel a little uneasy when i was based in Rosyth on the Jersey,just a feeling i got now and then that we ( the Englishstanis) wernt welcome,
  12. HOW DARE YOU! It is not possible to be English and a foreigner; everyone knows that. :wink:
  13. We're a mad lot...a good friend and colleugue of mine was a lady of Pakistani parentage, asked her if she ever encountered any racism, she said "some, but mostly because of my Yorkshire accent...none because of my great tan!"
  14. Actually, I am half Scottish myself.
    There, I admit it damn you!

    “We’re doomed I tell ye! doooomed!â€. 8O
  15. Try being in a Helensburgh boozer during a world cup/euro footie match when England are playing. Never heard a Scot cheer when England won or scored!!!!
  16. So true so true :D
  17. ive never heard a Englishman cheer when Scotland score
  18. I've never seen Scotland score (predictable but had to done)
  19. You started it! :(
  20. I don't think it was anything to do with being English, I come from Edinburgh and was always carteful about drinking in places like Rosyth and Dunfermline

Share This Page