Advice needed

Discussion in 'Diamond Lil's' started by seenoffteefcuk, Jun 10, 2010.

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  1. Having recently got out of a long term relationship i have been having a bit of slap and tickle with the barmaid from my local the problem is she has a fella and 2 kids.
    My problem is last night after a few sherbets the high and mighty Nick came out and called it off, you know the i really really like you etc but you have a fella and its not fair on him or your kids etc etc the usual guff when your shiterz and righteous(obviously this was after the lift home and the usual bit of dogging in my flat car park).
    Having woke up this morning i am greeted with 5 text msgs revealing how i am all she has thought about for the last couple of weeks and she wants our dogging episodes to carry on etc.
    Here is the question fellas has anyone got a taxi number for R$%^&*
    no seriously(as can be on lils) do i crack on in the usual matelot manner or do i stay on the righteous path and carry on to a future life of enlightenment for being the good guy for once.
    I know i can trust the guys on here to give me sound advice.
  2. She obviously reads more into the relationship than you do. Ask yourself - if things progressed would you want to be a surogate father to her sprogs?

    Then there is the small matter of the 'other fella' who may be a nice guy, but could equally be a murderous retard who could catch you in a dark corner and cut you a new arsehole.

    Plenty of casual shags around, without the baggage. IMHO she sees you as an escape route from her situation. I would bin her and find another watering hole.
  3. Does she take it up the stench trench? Does she swallow to the balls and chug down all your gentlemen's relish?

    These are the sort of things we need to know before giving a considered objective piece of advise.
  4. In all seriousness, you need to consider:

    1. How big is her other half? Is he likely to kick the crap out of you? Is he doing time or on the rigs?

    2. Is she loaded?

    3. Is she a good shag?

    4. Is she likely to dump her bloke and want to live with you in bliss, followed by routine, disillusionment, watching Jeremy Kyle while she puts on weight etc etc.

    5. Do you have a photo of her?
  5. She sounds quite vulnerable, in this situation there really is just one thing to do in order to create a situation that is right for you, her, her hubby and kids.

    Man the fcuk up and use her as your personal spunk receptacle until she has a minge like a clown's pocket.

    Once you get bored of that or you find a new pash, tell her you are going on deployment (preferably on a submarine) and disappear into the wind.
  6. 1 No.
    2 Dont really know him but apparently he is a bit of a pleb but could have potential psycho retardness
    3 Where i am staying at the moment there is not much going on fanny wise and the local i drink in is a cracker thats one of the main reasons i called it a day.
  7. Do you get the booze cheap?
  8. She is quite niave
    and thats more the advice i was looking for

  9. 1 No
    2 No
    3 Yes(very)
    4 Dont know
    5 Yes

  10. Think you owe it to us to post a piccie. Preferably naked on all fours and panting like a St Bernard.
  11. As much as i love you guys, at the moment that is just for me.
    I dont know how to anyway.
  12. The answer to No 3 means you are honour bound as an ex-matelot to keep humping it until she realises your not going to commit and then you can move on to the next sperm tank.
  13. I knew i could come on this site and get the advice i needed.
    I am afraid i may have to rejoin get a grip and stop hanging around with mankin civvy cnuts.
    Then again i could just text her and arrange another dogging session and man the fcuk up.
  14. And your avatar suggests that you didnt really need telling what to do with her anyway :D Did you.
  15. I would like to inform you guys i have manned the fcuk up and i am gonna be slamming the fcuk out of her tomorow night.
    Thanks for the advice
    and wrecker thanks for reminding me of my duties and responsabilities as an ex matelot i was almost overcome by the darkside.
  16. Good.

    Now go and take your head for a shit and don't let it happen again.
  17. Rodger that
  18. Then rodger her :D
  19. I am doing that at the moment in the texting world
    A good way of passing a boring day at work.
  20. I'm sure you remember how to send a picture via mobile phone (just ask B**k*y to remind you if you can't!). I've changed my phone number, so will let you know my new one via PM.

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