To the tune of "I Will Survive".... At first I was afraid, I was petrified Kept thinking I could never turn Spurs into a top four side But I spent oh so many nights thinking how Stalteri did me wrong Perhaps I'm wrong but I'll just have to carry on And we'll be back, into fifth place Wait till the transfer window, sign another waste of space I should have sold Paul Robinson, I should have dropped him from the team If I had known for just one second he'd concede more than Derby Go on now go - Bent, there's the door Just turn around now 'cause you don't score goals anymore Weren't you the one who cost more than Thierry Henry? I knew you'd crumble, I'd rather have Emile Hes-key. But I, I will survive Oh, if we just win the next six games I know I'll stay alive I've got Tainio who is crap and Huddlestone who's just fat But I'll survive, I will survive It took all the strength I had not to fall apart Kept trying hard to mend Defoe's relationship with his little tart And I spent oh so many nights trying on John Barnes's tights And oh I've cried, I want the Spurs job till I die! And you see Keane, he hates me too I subbed him off when we were winning then we went and fecking drew! And now I'm scratching my big chin, should I just sell Ledley King? If I'm gonna save my skin I'll need some Labour party spin Oh yes I, I will survive Levy wants the Special One because he's got more drive Or that bloke who's at Seville, just the thought it makes me ill Hang on what's that? You say my pay off is four mill?? Go on now go, I'm out the door Don't need you nasty dirty scum fans any more Tottenham have no class, so stick your job right up your arse And I'll survive, yes I'll surviiiiiiiiiiiiive! Yes I stole it, but funny as hell.