A new meaning of the word 'easy'...

Discussion in 'Current Affairs' started by sgtpepperband, Jun 3, 2009.

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  1. sgtpepperband

    sgtpepperband War Hero Moderator Book Reviewer

    This never fails to impress me. Britain's civil service at their unbeatable best. Read it (some of, don't try and understand, just skim) and be awed and amazed. You will understand why Britain is in the state it's in today.

    Note in particular the use of the word 'easy'. :shock:

    ****

    [align=center]Statutory Instrument 2004 No. 692
    The Communications (Television Licensing) Regulations 2004
    [/align]

    PART 3


    Easy entry television licence (including colour)

    8. - (1) This Part specifies the instalments which are payable in respect of a TV licence known as an "Easy entry television licence (not black and white only)" which is described in sub-paragraphs (2) to (4).

    (2) A licence of the type referred to in sub-paragraph (1) is a licence of the same description as that given in the second entry of column 2 of the table in Schedule 1 but where -


    (a) the person to whom the licence is issued is in receipt of one or more income-related state benefits; and

    (b) payment for the licence is to be made in instalments as provided in this Part.


    (3) Such a licence is only issued where the place, vehicle, vessel or caravan specified in the licence is in the United Kingdom.

    (4) Such a licence is only issued for a period which is more than 8 months where payments are made in respect of the licence before the due date.

    (5) In this Part, any reference to the period of a licence is to the period beginning on the date on which the licence is issued and ending on the date on which it expires.

    9. Where no payment is made in respect of the licence before the due date -



    (a) the amount of the first instalment (referred to in this Part as the "issue fee") is to be £5.00 payable on the date on which the licence is issued;

    (b) 25 further instalments are to be payable at weekly intervals with the first of those instalments being payable on the date which is the last day of the period of 1 week beginning on the day immediately following the date on which the licence is issued;

    (c) the amount of each of the first 24 of those instalments is to be £4.70 and the amount of the final instalment is to be £3.20.


    10. - (1) This paragraph and paragraphs 11 to 17 apply where payments are made in respect of the licence before the due date.

    (2) An issue fee and a number of further instalments are to be payable in respect of such a licence.

    (3) The issue fee is to be payable on the date on which the licence is issued.

    (4) The number of further instalments, and the dates on which the instalments are to be payable, are to be determined in accordance with paragraphs 12 to 17.

    11. - (1) Where the first payment in respect of the issue fee is made on the first day of a period of more than 20 weeks ending on the relevant date, the amount of the issue fee shall be £61.40.

    (2) Where that payment is made on the first day of a period of more than 16 but not more than 20 weeks ending on the relevant date, the amount of the issue fee shall be £49.50.

    (3) Where that payment is made on the first day of a period of more than 12 but not more than 16 weeks ending on the relevant date, the amount of the issue fee shall be £45.50.

    (4) Where that payment is made on the first day of a period of more than 8 but not more than 12 weeks ending on the relevant date, the amount of the issue fee shall be £34.20;

    (5) Where that payment is made on the first day of a period of more than 4 but not more than 8 weeks ending on the relevant date, the amount of the issue fee shall be £23.50;

    (6) Where that payment is made on the first day of a period of not more than 4 weeks ending on the relevant date, the amount of the issue fee is shall be £9.00.

    12. - (1) This paragraph applies where the issue fee payable is £61.40.

    (2) Where the period of the licence is more than 11 months -



    (a) 10 further instalments are to be payable at fortnightly intervals with the first of those instalments being payable on the date which is the last day of the period of 2 weeks beginning on the day immediately following the date on which the licence is issued;

    (b) the amount of each of the first 8 of those instalments is to be £6.00 and the amount of each of the remaining 2 instalments is to be £5.80.


    (3) Where the period of the licence is more than 10 but is not more than 11 months -



    (a) 8 further instalments are to be payable at fortnightly intervals with the first of those instalments being payable on the date which is the last day of the period of 2 weeks beginning on the day immediately following the date on which the licence is issued;

    (b) the amount of each of the first 2 of those instalments is to be £7.60 and the amount of each of the remaining 6 instalments is to be £7.40.


    (4) Where the period of the licence is more than 9 but is not more than 10 months -



    (a) 6 further instalments are to be payable at fortnightly intervals with the first of those instalments being payable on the date which is the last day of the period of 2 weeks beginning on the day immediately following the date on which the licence is issued;

    (b) the amount of each of the first 5 of those instalments is to be £10.00 and the final instalment is to be £9.60.


    (5) Where the period of the licence is more than 8 but is not more than 9 months -



    (a) 4 further instalments are to be payable at fortnightly intervals with the first of those instalments being payable on the date which is the last day of the period of 2 weeks beginning on the day immediately following the date on which the licence is issued;

    (b) the amount of each of the first 2 of those instalments is to be £15.00 and the amount of each of the remaining 2 instalments is to be £14.80.


    13. - (1) This paragraph applies where the issue fee payable is £49.50.

    (2) Sub-paragraphs (2) to (5) of paragraph 12 are to have effect subject to the following modifications -



    (a) sub-paragraph (2)(b) is to have effect as if it provided for the amount of the first of the instalments to be £7.60 and the amount of the remaining 9 instalments to be £7.10 each;

    (b) sub-paragraph (3)(b) is to have effect as if it provided for the amount of each of the first 7 of the instalments to be £9.00 and the final instalment to be £8.50;

    (c) sub-paragraph (4)(b) is to have effect as if it provided for the amount of each of the first 5 of the instalments to be £12.00 and the final instalment to be £11.50;

    (d) sub-paragraph (5)(b) is to have effect as if it provided for the amount of each of the first 3 of the instalments to be £18.50 and the final instalment to be £16.00.


    14. - (1) This paragraph applies where the issue fee payable is £45.50.

    (2) Sub-paragraphs (2) to (5) of paragraph 12 are to have effect subject to the following modifications -



    (a) sub-paragraph (2)(b) is to have effect as if it provided for the amount of each of the first 5 of the instalments to be £7.60 and the amount of the remaining 5 instalments to be £7.50 each;

    (b) sub-paragraph (3)(b) is to have effect as if it provided for the amount of each of the first 7 of the instalments to be £9.50 and the final instalment to be £9.00;

    (c) sub-paragraph (4)(b) is to have effect as if it provided for the amount of each of the first 5 of the instalments to be £12.60 and the final instalment to be £12.50;

    (d) sub-paragraph (5)(b) is to have effect as if it provided for the amount of the first of the instalments to be £19.10 and the amount of the remaining 3 instalments to be £18.80 each.


    15. - (1) This paragraph applies where the issue fee payable is £34.20.

    (2) Sub-paragraphs (2) to (5) of paragraph 12 are to have effect subject to the following modifications -



    (a) sub-paragraph (2)(b) is to have effect as if it provided for the amount of each of the first 2 of the instalments to be £9.00 and the amount of the remaining 8 instalments to be £8.60 each;

    (b) sub-paragraph (3)(b) is to have effect as if it provided for the amount of the first of the instalments to be £11.20 and the amount of the remaining 7 instalments to be £10.80 each;

    (c) sub-paragraph (4)(b) is to have effect as if it provided for the amount of the first of the instalments to be £14.80 and the amount of the remaining 5 instalments to be £14.40 each;

    (d) sub-paragraph (5)(b) is to have effect as if it provided for the amount of the first of the instalments to be £22.00 and the amount of the remaining 3 instalments to be £21.60 each.


    16. - (1) This paragraph applies where the issue fee payable is £23.50.

    (2) Sub-paragraphs (2) to (5) of paragraph 12 are to have effect subject to the following modifications -



    (a) sub-paragraph (2)(b) is to have effect as if it provided for the amount of each of the first 5 of those instalments to be £10.00 and the amount of the remaining 5 instalments to be £9.50 each;

    (b) sub-paragraph (3)(b) is to have effect as if it provided for the amount of each of the first 7 of those instalments to be £12.20 and the final instalment to be £12.10;

    (c) sub-paragraph (4)(b) is to have effect as if it provided for the amount of each of the first 3 of those instalments to be £16.40 and the amount of the remaining 3 instalments to be £16.10 each;

    (d) sub-paragraph (5)(b) is to have effect as if it provided for the amount of each of the first 3 of those instalments to be £24.40 and the final instalment to be £24.30.


    17. - (1) This paragraph applies where the issue fee payable is £9.00.

    (2) Sub-paragraphs (2) to (5) of paragraph 12 are to have effect subject to the following modifications -



    (a) sub-paragraph (2)(b) is to have effect as if it provided for the amount of each of the instalments to be £11.20;

    (b) sub-paragraph (3)(b) is to have effect as if it provided for the amount of each of the instalments to be £14.00;

    (c) sub-paragraph (4)(b) is to have effect as if it provided for the amount of each of the first 5 of those instalments to be £19.00 and the final instalment to be £17.00;

    (d) sub-paragraph (5)(b) is to have effect as if it provided for the amount of each of the instalments to be £28.00.

    :evil:
     
  2. I lost the will to live after the 3rd para, question is. Can I have a fcuking licence :twisted: :twisted:
     
  3. Our civil serpents have obviously been learning from their German counterparts, who are absolute masters at gobbledy gook.

    I must admit, I have to wonder about some one who spends his time digging up such "gems". :D
     
  4. Errr, easy?........well I have been known to say errr,...........well not put up a lot of resistance, but I'm not a complete slag, more of a semi slut. :D
     
  5. GORDON BENNETT!
     
  6. Ok got all that!


    Now what the flying fish does it mean!
     
  7. Your point being? You should read some of the s**t that comes out of the Joint Supply Chain! English she spoke as second language.
     
  8. Seadog

    Seadog War Hero Moderator

    I expect that some of the TV licence guff was drafted by the BBC or their sub contracted 'enforcers' and foisted upon the CS by some special advisor to the PM and now appears as an Act.

    I know that the BBC is supposed to be neutral but they are making such a good job of not pointing out some home truths to government interviewees and giving Broon the last word that one can't help but suspect that HMG dances to the BBC tune. That'll be a U2 tune but that's another thread.

    POL wrote
    I share your pain. Some of the 'how it all works' diagrams would baffle Professor Hawking. Logistics; like rocket science, but harder.
     
  9. What does my head in about most of these government spiels is that ultimately they are a smoke screen to try to justify the "Price increase"
    They never inform you directly about rises in cost on things like the TV licence, so if you pay by direct debit or S/order the first you know is when you receive the licence.
    Bunning Castards. :cry:
     
  10. There are guidelines on how to draft Parliamentary primary and secondary legislation. The precise nomenclature is set out in the guidelines in order that there is consistency across departments (responsible for drafting secondary instruments (SIs)). The Civil Service College do a drafting course if anyone is interested. A few years ago the course lasted a fortnight! 8) Some are more readable than others, though.... :roll:

    Civil Service College: nice surroundings, good scran, congenial company, informative courses. If you think the SI is less than transparent I suggest you go on a drafting course for EU consultative documents! 8O



    Oops.... Sorry, I appear to have bitten!
     
  11. I havent bothered to read all that as its bollocks. But if you are setting up a brand new tv license its £28 a month for the first 6 months so you get in 6 months credit.
    Is it just me or is that a stupid system?
     

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