Results 11 to 20 of 20
- 24-05-12, 11:31 #11
- Join Date
- Jun 2009
I normally have to control my urge to utter American GI / war movie style comments at meeting at work.
The worst is "Any questions?"
"Yeah, how do ah get outta this chickenshit outfit?"
I dont think that any of my colleagues would find it funny or know the appropriate response.
My other favourite is "This is a shit sandwich and we are all going to have to take a bite."
I am due to leave soon so I think I will just start using them.
Any other suggested comments welcome...My parents told me I could be anything that I wanted to be, so I became an arsehole.
24-05-12, 11:58 #12
We used to play bullshit bingo at meetings, draw up a list of things like, nebulous, best bang for a buck , blue sky thinking, thinking out of the box etc then tick them off as the grownups use them.
24-05-12, 12:10 #13
.........we all actually did our work strictly in accordance with European guidelines and all the legislation as laid down
by the Health & Safety Executive. Would we actually get anything fu**ing done.......ever? The mind is boggling.
"Schitzophrenics are people too - just more of them"
24-05-12, 12:18 #14
Topstop, I know it's 42 you muppet, hence the exclamation mark instead of one of them there emoticon thingmajigsSh1t shot, pumping slop.
24-05-12, 15:19 #15
24-05-12, 16:31 #16
- Join Date
- Nov 2009
- If tha eva duz owt fer nowt.....alus do it fer thisen
What would happen if ?............................my mate was on watch on the blr front on Fife, Tiff had been working on the nudyne auto control of fuel recirc line and had left the cover off, mate was sat there having a tab and feeding bits of rag into the cogs of nudyne motor until one thicker piece of rag got stuck. Mate gave it a hefty tug and......tika tika tika tika....... blr shut down.
'' Don't know Chief, fukka just went into spasm and shut down''.
24-05-12, 19:40 #17
- Join Date
- Nov 2008
- Sunny, southern Spain
On a S boat, one of the UCs was bored......
I got called out to a snag on a display with attached keyboard - it just would not do what it was told. Press UP it went DOWN, LEFT it went RIGHT etc, It was an Elmer bit of kit, so out came the books - nothing, nada, ZIP. We were going loopy, especially as the other unit was functioning just fine, so it was coming down to 'repair by replacement' with the known good unit. Then we noticed the keypads were different.
The little shit had pulled the buttons off the keypad on 'his' display and swapped them round. My how we laughed... he didn't.
Submariners seldom cheat, and NEVER lie!
Why is it acceptable to cry at a wedding but not to laugh at a funeral?
Age and treachery will always overcome youth and fitness!
25-05-12, 18:38 #18
25-05-12, 19:56 #19
25-05-12, 20:48 #20
Oh, harsh. Unless you were somewhere shit before?
I'm currently looking for offensive mess guests...